Broke-Ass Tag: wedding stress


It’s less than two months to go ’til the wedding, and in my waking hours I am nothing but serene. Everything is progressing nicely, budget looks tight but good, and Mr Fiance and I are getting more and more excited about the big day.

So why are my nights plagued by stress dreams? I know BAB has talked about wedding nightmares before (wedmares, anyone?), but I didn’t think it was a real thing until … well, it really started happening to me.

blank-space-etsy-coffee-mugMug via Etsy seller StudioCicadaHome
T-Swizzy may as well have been talking about weddings with this lyric.

Seriously BABs, night after night I am having nightmares: like the rings haven’t arrived, or the dresses haven’t been fitted before the day, or who knows WHAT?!

There’s clearly a small, psychotic part of my mind which is secretly pooping itself about all things wedding. What I need to figure out, before I go completely insane, is what the heck is bothering it so much?!?

Have you guys been bothered by wedding-related stress dreams? What did you do to get rid of them? Help BABs!

Am Dram Bride – out!

Emma Watkins
  • 3/13


    Credit:  Lucky Photographer

    The first step to having a grown-up wedding is acknowledging that you’re a grown-up. And that your guests and family are grown-ups. Marriage is the second most grown-up thing you can do. So, you might as well start now with the day that’s going to start it all off. In the immortal words of Monica Geller, “It sucks, you’re going to love it.”

    You’re saying Yes … to Everything.

    Your wedding is not something that’s happening to you. From the cost, to the menu, to the dress, to the guest list, to the decorations. With a shrug, with a frown, with an enthusiastic clapping of hands. You opted in. It’s a big day, and a big undertaking and it’s easy to do it now and resent the hell out of it later. So, remember:

    You can say No … to Anything.

    Easy to write, not so easy to do. I get yelled at a lot for this one. “I can’t say no to my parents [insert this thing they really want here], it’s impossible.” Nothing is impossible, but yes, some things are hard. You don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, you’re afraid you’re going to sound like a rude jerk. We covered this a little last week. Most people are not great at conflict, whether they are used to it or not. Be clear that you don’t want it, thank them for the suggestion, if there is an alternative that you like, hype it. Don’t be defensive, smile, change the subject. Works, I swear.

    Your Guests are Adults. They Are Also Human Beings in Your Spotlight.

    It’s mostly you on stage, but it’s not just you. Everyone wants to get it right, so everyone can enjoy the day. Back your guests up where you can — directional signs, someone standing by to help them find their place card. They do need to know where the restrooms are, they don’t have to be assigned a particular seat at a particular table. No one is going to freak out if you’re serving Coors Light and $5 wine instead of their choice of martini cocktails. Don’t think babysitting, just think “flow.” You cannot please everyone, but you can make it easier for them to enjoy themselves. What would you want if you were a guest? What would need? Make sure that’s covered.

    Get Clear About Your Wedding Responsibilities

    What goes into your wedding day must come out. When? Someone has to do it, and if it’s not you, then who? What are you allowed to do, and what are you not? Hint: If it has to be stuck on anything, sprinkled, lit or hung, ask first. How long do you have your vendors? When do they need to get paid? What do they need from you to do their job? Don’t assume they will stay later than asked and not get paid for that, or come earlier, or bring more equipment. Don’t make the day harder for them, because it’s going to end up being harder for you. That’s not going to be a good day.

    Fly Casual

    You have a destination — your big fun, love- and joy-infused wedding day — and you are on your way. You have to give it some time, but you’re going to get there. You don’t have to worry about whether you’re doing it, because you’re doing it. There are plenty of maps and resources to help you. Course corrections can be made — they are not the end of the world or evidence that you are a crappy pilot. And when you get there, ENJOY THE DAY. That’s an order. It’s what adults do. And in the meantime, go easy on yourself, I can guarantee you’re doing a lot better than you think you are.

    So, how are you taking a deep breath and putting on the big girl pants when it comes to your wedding? What do you think of my advice? Let me know in the comments below! And if you would like to learn a little more about me and and my part of Wedding World, come visit me at

    See you at the end of the aisle,

  • 3/10

    Feminism is a complicated term. The fact that it even needs to exist as a concept is frustrating in itself, but with so many varied (and heated) interpretations of the word bouncing around in today's media, it almost starts to feel like a taboo topic in many circles. Its most basic definition, though, is the idea that society should consider women as equals to men.…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!


    Credit: Powell Pictures So, I’ve been checking in with my 2015 couples a lot this week. March’s backyard wedding was relocated to another backyard. May wants a photo booth.  I’m looking at venues with July #2 this weekend. June #1 is in way better shape than she thinks she is. And, actually, so are you. Remember that the next time you start to wonder. What’s been…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!


    I believe that it’s not enough to simply survive planning your wedding, you should thrive and feel like a Boss while you're doing it.  Here are five wedding planning habits to start practicing now that will help. Let’s start with the money, first: 1.Multiplication. Avoid sticker shock that every couple goes through, and  remember that you are buying in bulk. For example, Chiavari chairs  for  $10…

    Read the full article →
  • 4/29

    Up until about a week ago, I was fairly laidback about my wedding. This surprised me, because I tend to be somewhat of an anxious person. I was pretty proud of myself. However, it seemed like once I got in the 3 month range, a little timer went off and all of a sudden I was in panic mode. This is my "are you kidding…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!


    Heeeyyyoooo!!! Now that you're rockin' that sparkler and all you newbie Broke-Ass Brides are starting to look ahead to your big day, I think it's important to sit you down and talk about that horrible monster that is sure to rear its ugly head at some point during your planning process ... BRIDE BRAIN. *cue suspenseful music* But Christen!, you're saying, I'm totes rational and there's no…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!


    Hey there, BABs! Back in the days when I was debating where we should get married, I mentioned our plan to move to San Diego, California, from Ohio.  Well, I'm happy to announce that we turned that plan into action and... HERE WE ARE! Honestly, now that I'm here, I'm really glad we decided to have our wedding in Arizona.  Trying to find a place…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!
  • 9/26

    Wedding stress can take a serious toll on your physical, emotional, and mental reserves. The bills, the coordination, the family conflict--it can bubble up into one big mess of no time for yourself currently and none for the foreseeable future, either! 1Hour Break wants to change that and help you battle the wedding stress monster with their concentrated kava spray! 1Hour Break is a 100%…

    Read the full article →
    Share this!