Posts in the 'Wedding Photography' Category

Real Bride Carrie: Highlights from Our Ceremony

Coming up with a meaningful wedding ceremony from scratch proved to be quite the challenge!  We ended up using many sources…traditional Christian ceremonies, literature we both loved, inspiration from wedding blogs, and my amazing Grandfather/officiant.  In the end, I’m so so so happy with how personal and emotional our ceremony was!  Here are a few highlights!

We used “Sigh No More” by Mumford and Sons as our processional music.

Walking down the aisle, I couldn’t believe it was finally happening!  All I tried to do was breathe and stay present in the moment as much as possible.  After some introductory words from my grandfather, one of our friends read our first reading, a poem by e.e. cummings that we love!

“i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
                                                      i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)”

Instead of a unity candle, we decided to include a ritual that was much more “us” in our ceremony.  So we planted a tree!  Much of the credit for this idea goes to the awesome blog 2000 Dollar Wedding.  We played “Old Pine” by Ben Howard while we got our Aspen sapling into the ground.

Grandpa: Zach and Carrie have chosen to symbolize their commitment here today by planting a tree with the help of their parents.  Just as the love and support of their parents has helped them grow into the people they are today, so will the water and soil here support and nourish this tree.  While it is now a small sapling, over time, with proper care, it will grow and flourish into a strong and mature aspen tree.  Given the same care and attention, the marriage of these two will similarly flourish and prosper.

One of our best friends gave our next reading, a quote by Louis de Bernieres:

“Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And
when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether
your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you
should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness,
it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is
just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over
when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate
accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other
underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their
branches, they find that they are one tree and not two.”

I loved how this quote also tied in the tree metaphor!  Next was the hardest part: our vows!  We wrote our own vows and didn’t share them with each other beforehand.  I was so afraid I would start bawling!  Zach went first, and I just tried to absorb his words without starting to cry!

Zach:  When I met you, my life was good, but there was always something missing.  After only a few dates, I knew you were the person I needed.  I knew you were the one.  I found a new satisfaction in life that was exciting and real.  I felt whole.
Carrie, I love you because every day you expect me to be a better man than the day before.  You’re never satisfied with the normal thing, only greatness.
I love you because there is no one like you in the world.  You’re caring, thoughtful, and the funnest person that I have ever met.
I promise to love you no matter what.  I promise to wake up every day with the thought of making our lives better.  I promise to work as hard and as long as I need to make sure we accomplish all of our goals.  I promise to listen to what you need and continue my quest to be your perfect partner.  I cannot wait to spend my life with you.

Next was my turn!  Ahhh!!!  Thankfully, my acting training from back in the day kicked in, and I was able to keep a clear and strong voice, despite the emotional weight of the moment.

Carrie:  Zach, when I met you, unexpectedly, the timing was horrible.  But it didn’t take me long to fall in love with you.  For the first time ever, I felt that my life was not all about me anymore.  You were the first and only person who I ever considered changing my best-laid life plans for.  When we were continents apart I laid under my African mosquito net and dreamed of our future together as I fell asleep.  I think I knew, even then, that we would someday be standing where we are right now.
Zach, I love that you are constantly seeking to learn more about the world.  I love how you can’t ever read a book or watch a movie without something making you say “I want to do that!” or “I want to go there!”  I love that you are so calm under pressure, so laid back, and so optimistic and joyful about life.  In you I find a balance I desperately need, and I am so grateful for that.  I love that you have so many talents and are wildly successful at anything you try, from hockey, to science, to music, to cooking.  Every day I am more proud that you are mine.
Zach, because I love you, I promise to always be by your side.  To take care of you when you’re sick or sad or tired.  To seek to understand you more every day.  I promise to control my temper and impatience, to be a better partner for you every day.  I promise to appreciate the ways in which we are different, as they make us perfectly compatible.  I promise to use my skills and abilities to make all of our adventures unforgettable.  I promise to support you and to prioritize our relationship no matter what obstacles we encounter.  
Love, I believe, is an action and a choice and I will choose to love you even when it’s hard, even when it hurts, and even when I don’t want to.  And I promise that I will be faithful to you, and God willing, we will keep exploring the world together until we are both old and gray.

Since we didn’t buy new or different wedding bands, we exchanged the same rings we had been wearing as engagement rings all along.  The symbolism of rings was still an important part of the ceremony for us.

The rings on our fingers, we were almost done!

Grandpa:  Forasmuch as Zachary and Carrie have consented together in holy wedlock and have witnessed the same before God and this company, and thereto have pledged their faith each to the other, and have declared the same by joining hands and by giving and receiving rings; by the power vested in me by the state of Arizona, I now pronounce them husband and wife.  What God has joined together let no one put asunder.  Zach, you may now kiss the bride!

For the closing of our ceremony, we couldn’t help but include the commonly-used but wonderful Apache Wedding Blessing.  This blessing spoke perfectly to our love for travel, adventure, and each other!

Now you will feel no storms,
for each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there is no loneliness,
for each of you is companion to the other,
You are two persons,
but there is one life before you, and one home.
Turn together to look at the road you traveled,
to reach this—the hour of your happiness.
It stretches behind you into the past.
Look to the future that lies ahead.
A long and winding, adventure-filled road,
whose every turn means discovery,
new hopes, new joys, new laughter,
and a few shared tears.
May happiness be your companion,
May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead;
And through all the years to come.
Go this day to your dwelling place
and enter into your days together.
May your days be good and long
upon the earth.
Your adventure has just begun!

As we recessed down the aisle in a haze of exhilaration, “That’s What’s Up” by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros played and all of our guests clapped and cheered for us!

Totally unexpectedly, the recessional actually produced some of my favorite pics from our day!  Aren’t the looks of pure joy on our faces just unbeatable?

Coming up next:  Our homespun reception!

All photos copyright Bright Fizz Photo

Win This: Score Killer Photography From LA Budget Wedding Photographer!

Wedding photography is so important; it’s one of the few things you’ll be able to keep after the big day is over. But fitting a quality photographer into your broke-ass budget can be a challenge, especially in a major metro area. Luckily, LA Budget Wedding Photographer has your back!

LA Budget Wedding Photographer operates under the principle that being on a budget is no excuse for bad wedding photos, so they offer great flat-rate packages and ala carte add-ons to fit your needs, from two hours of photography to an entire day. With all packages, you’ll receive printing rights to print your photos at the photo lab of your choice, and with most, you’ll receive a USB stick of unedited images the day of your wedding, so there’s no agonizing wait until you can post the entire shebang to the social media sites of your choice! With these rates, you must be getting amateur photographers, right? Not so! The group of photographers that comprises LA Budget Wedding Photographer are internationally published professionals who use quality equipment, have plenty of wedding experience under their belts, and carry backup equipment. You may have a number of worries on your mind on your wedding day, but when you use LA Budget Wedding Photographer, your photography needn’t be one of them!

This week, one lucky BAB will win a six hour wedding photography package (travel costs included) from LA Budget Wedding Photographer (Greater L.A. area only, package must be used by December 31st, 2014)! Want it bad? Get a free easy entry by subscribing to our bi-weekly newsletter! It’s packed full of deals and steals and we’ll never ever sell your email address or spam ya!

 
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{Real Bride: Carrie} Carrie & Zach Get Their First Look!

I wish we could say that we woke up refreshed and well-rested the day of our wedding, but what couple ever does?  The stress and work of the week prior, plus the “catching up with old friends” shenanigans of the night before led to not the best sleeping conditions.  But, on the morning of June 15, who cared?  We sure didn’t!  It was our wedding day, finally!!!!!!!!

Since we spent the night before our wedding together, we had no reason to stay separate and not see each other the day of.  So off we headed to the house to finish the last-minute cooking, baking, and trying to make sure everyone knew what they were doing!  A couple Red Bulls were consumed to keep us going!

At 3pm, we headed back to the hotel to meet our photographer and finally get ready!  This is the first time we separated, wanting to surprise each other with our completed “looks” once we were all pretty-fied!  From here on out, I tried to stay in the moment as much as possible, but day did speed up and everything was a bit of a blur of excitement and emotion.  Thankfully Rachel from Bright Fizz Photo did an amazing job capturing everything!  I’ll let her gorgeous work do the talking from here:

Zach’s completed look.

Makeup time!

My sister ties me up!

Rachel found the PERFECT place for our “first look” at this fun/cheesy little “Wild West Land” place in town.

Taking some more shots around town!

And taking a drink to loosen up!

Arriving at the house for the ceremony!

Here we go!

Partner Love + Win This: Turn Your Fave Photos In To Beautiful Canvas Prints With Canvas On Demand!


Hey newlyweds! Congratulations! Your wedding is finished, you survived the big day and now you’re ogling all your gorgeous photos and reveling in the memories of your fantastic party, full of heartfelt moments and sweet shenanigans. But what are you going to do with all those gorgeous moments caught on camera? And as for all you soon-to-be-weds, how would you like a sweet-ass deal on a fabulous keepsake that does double duty as home decor?

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65% off 16x20 photo canvases. $45 includes shipping!

Head on over to Canvas on Demand and enter the code FTSGEK9S7UWRE5K to snag this amazing deal and get those beautiful moments from your big day on display in a beautiful way. Or just print whatever photos make you happy! Or give a gift! The holidays ARE right around the corner… *cough*


But you didn’t think that was all, did you? No, friends, we’re better enablers than that! We’re giving away one free 16″ x 20″ canvas to a lucky BAB reader!

Want an easy free entry? Sign up for our bi-weekly newsletter! In it, you’ll find contest info, great nationwide bridal deals, and super-awesome Broke-Ass Bride exclusive deals…and we’ll never spam ya! But there’s a few more ways to enter, too, so go forth, and increase your odds!

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Real Wedding: Etan & Megan’s Modern, “Bookish”, Table-Dancing Los Angeles Wedding

Bringing personality to a wedding while still keeping costs low  is a challenge all couples face. Etan and Megan added a great amount of character to their celebration with lots of DIY décor, and a group of people willing to dig in their heels and help this self described “bookish” couple. This Los Angeles duo focused on celebrating what they absolutely loved without going overboard. Good food, cold brews, laughter, good books, and twinkly lights are the key ingredients to this extremely charming L.A. wedding. 

Names: Etan & Megan Rosenbloom

Occupations: Etan works in marketing in the music industry and is a heavy metal music journalist. Megan is a medical librarian who works with rare books.

Wedding location: Lehrer Architects, Silver Lake, Los Angeles, Calif.

Wedding date: Oct. 13, 2012

Approximate guest count: 80

How would you describe your wedding? Everything about our wedding was very personal, from the elements of the ceremony to the DIY décor to the barn raising feeling of putting the whole thing together with friends and family. Also, all the things we didn’t do ourselves we sourced super locally, whether it was the clothes, the food, the beer, so it was a very eastside of LA wedding. We had a lot of bookish decor, which makes sense as we’re both pretty bookish people.

What was your favorite part of your wedding?
Megan: After all of our hard work, taking a moment to breathe and watch our friends and family all together getting hyped on the dance floor and being humbled by the fact that they were all here for us.
Etan: The heightened sense of intimacy with Megan under the chuppah.

What did you splurge on? We didn’t really “splurge” on anything, but as might be expected our biggest expense was the food. But Whoa Nelly Catering worked with us to keep costs low and delivered absolutely amazing food. Our foodie and vegan friends were especially delighted with their offerings, which were all sourced from our local farmers’ markets. Many people said it was the best food they’ve ever had at a wedding.

What did you save on? We managed to save a lot on booze. We are really into craft beer (even my bouquet had fresh hops in it!) so we wanted that to be the star of the show. A friend of ours runs a great beer bar and was able to source three California craft beer kegs for a great price, and then, sweetheart that she is, ended up gifting us one of them. So we had world class beer for our guests for a song. We got our wine from BevMo on their 5 cent sale, so a lot of our bottles were only a nickel! We didn’t want to have a full liquor bar, so next to our agua frescas we had a “spike station” with a bottle each of vodka, whiskey, gin and tequila for people to spike their drinks if they wished. We also borrowed PA equipment from music friends and Etan created some great Spotify playlists for dinner and for dancing.

Was there anything you would have done differently, in retrospect? We probably should have hired a videographer. We had a lot of family & friends who couldn’t make the trip. Our friend who shot the video on my personal camera did a great job stepping up to help, but my gear just wasn’t up to snuff. We also should have reminded people to do certain things like use the photo booth or thumbprint the guestbook to get more participants in those activities.

What was your biggest challenge in planning? Mostly just trying to stay sane while working full-time and doing all of these DIY projects at night, and knowing when to let a certain project go if it just wasn’t working out.

 

What lessons did you learn from planning or from the wedding itself? From planning the wedding, I learned a lot about time management and balancing all the things I wanted to create and what I could feasibly achieve. At one point, I was thinking that I was working really hard to make certain things that no one was going to notice. I was pleasantly surprised that our guests really did notice all the hard work and love that my friends and I put into all the details of the wedding. Having people come up and mention certain small elements that they enjoyed really made me proud as a crafter and made all the work worth it. I also learned not to be afraid to ask friends for help, and our friends gave us a lot of help in too many ways to list here. At the wedding itself, having everyone there for us, taking part in this very intimate moment, really hammered home just how much we are loved and supported as we forge our new family together.

What were your top five favorite things about your wedding?

It’s hard to pick just five!

  1. Our groomsman/ brosmaid Alexis was a giant help with a lot of the crafting and lighting design, and he designed one area that he could decorate however he wanted. He made us this beautiful lamp where he cut pages out of our two favorite books (Ulysses & Finnegans Wake, both by James Joyce) into leaf shapes, laminated them, and attached them to the lamp so the light glows through the words. He also made us a clever table out of dictionary where the ashtray rested on the page for “smoke” words and the cup holder rested on the page for “drink” words. He made this lovely little oasis for us where we relaxed and took a few photos immediately after the ceremony. Now both of these items adorn our home and we love them to death, and every time we look at them we think of him and all he did for us. Alexis was rewarded in a surprising way for all of his hard work…he fell in love with our bridesmaid Maryanne at the wedding and is now moving across the country to be with her!
  2. We were lucky enough to have Etan’s mom’s best friend, Cantor Perryne Anker, as our officiant & pre-marital counselor. She’s been present at the ceremonies for many of Etan’s major life events, and was a great calming guide for both of us through this whole process. She made the ceremony personal, moving, and funny…everything we could have asked for.
  3. Instead of the traditional parent-child dance, Etan and his mother Aviva did a choreographed Israeli folk dance to the song “Erev Ba” and everyone was very impressed by how light on their feet they were! It was a beautiful, touching moment. Aviva was glowing with motherly pride.
  4. Watching our two very different families from separate coasts get to know each other and enjoy each other’s company was a real treat. We might not ever get everyone together in the same spot again, so that was really special for us.
  5. Watching all of our friends and family go absolutely apeshit on the dance floor was a huge highlight. I took a moment to just enjoy the scene and be glad we could bring all of these wonderful people together, if just for an evening. The first song was Prince’s “Let’s Go Crazy” and when Prince starts in with his little sermon, everyone just went wild. Our friends Josh, Grant and Agatha ran over to me during the song, looked at the table near the dance floor and said, “Wanna Breakfast Club this shit?” OF COURSE. So we all got up and danced on the table, and at the end of the song Etan came over and I jumped into his arms from the table and he spun me around and kissed me as the song ended. It was a total movie moment…even better than The Breakfast Club. I’ll never forget it.

Top five least favorite?

  1. The ceremony music false-started so our bridesmaid Lavinia had to swoop in and save the day by restarting it.
  2. We found out a few days before that there were some plumbing issues so we had to scramble and get a port-a-potty for the guests. I kinda had a meltdown about it at first, but they turned out to be really nice as far as port-a-potties go, and no one cared.
  3. The whole shebang ran late so we didn’t get enough dancing time, we should have allotted more wiggle room…I think our friends could have danced for hours more!
  4. We were so busy and things went so fast that I only got one of those delicious beers and we didn’t get any pie until the next day.
  5. The next day it was super hot, we were all exhausted, but we had to go back to the venue to take down all the decorations and clean up. That and returning all of the borrowed stuff and trying to sell the things we don’t need was kind of onerous but wasn’t too awful.

What was the worst piece of wedding advice you received? People told Etan to let me do everything and make all the decisions, that it was my day. That’s not true, it was OUR day, and we learned quickly that making these decisions together was crucial. The last thing Etan wanted was to show up to our wedding and not even recognize what was going on, so he was involved in the whole decision-making process even if he was less involved in the actual crafting parts.

The best? Try to take time to be in the moment…it is so true. When you plan a whole year for one day, it’s insane how fast it’ll go by. Also whether you’re a DIY bride or not, whatever you do, hire a professional event coordinator for the day of the wedding. You will not be able to manage the logistics on your own, and it’s not fair to push it off on a bridesmaid or family member…they want to enjoy your wedding too, not work at it!

Any other bits of wisdom? Have the wedding that speaks to who you are. It wasn’t the fact that we did a lot of things ourselves that made it personal, it was that I’m a DIY person and that reflects who I am. If you’re not a crafty person, don’t try to craft a bunch of stuff for the wedding because you feel like that’s what you’re supposed to do. We carefully picked all of our own music not only to save money on a DJ, but because we’re music people and we had to have every song count. If you don’t like cake, don’t have one! We had pie. We’ve been to a lot of weddings as guests and I would say the only ones that we ever found a bit disappointing were ones where it felt like the couple was making choices because they felt pressure to from some source outside of themselves — whether it be a family member, friends, or the general wedding industrial complex. Your friends and family love you, and they want to celebrate who you are as a couple, so show them who you are in the way you do your wedding, even if that means eloping.

Vendors
Caterers: Whoa Nelly Catering
Flowers, Crowns & Boutonnieres: The Paper Arum
Photography: Lindsay Giles McWilliams (Denver, Colorado) & Sarah Law Photography: (Southern California, soon to be based in Portland, Oregon)
Musical Performance: Homesick Elephant featuring Kelly Sulick
Valet: Hollywood Hills Valet
Bride’s Dress: Shareen Vintage
Bride’s Hair: Megan Klammer at Heretic Salon
Bride’s Makeup: Heather Cvar at Le Pink & Co. Apothecary
Bridesmaids’ Dresses: Matrushka Construction
Flower Girl Dress: Made by friend
Groom’s Suit: Al Weiss
Groomsmen’s Blazers: ASOS
Groomsmen’s Ties: Zara
Engagement Ring: Single Stone
Wedding Bands: Claude Morady
Save the Dates: Photo by Sarah Law Photography; Design by And She Designs
Invitations, seating cards and programs: Designed and handmade by the bride
Ketubah: Gallery Judaica
Ketubah Art: Peter Wonsowski
Thumbprint Guest Book & table numbers: Bear Witness Studio

DIY projects
Decor primarily by the bride Megan Rosenbloom & groomsman Alexis Bourbeau
Custom Lighting by groomsman Alexis Bourbeau (abourbeau@aol.com)
Mothers’ shawls, groom’s kippah, and bride’s capelet knit by the bride
Challah cover embroidery by the groom’s aunt Alma Schneider, sewn by the bride

If there is one lesson to take from Etan and Megan’s big day it’s to be realistic about your time. Most ladies become DIY divas in an effort to add personal touches to their wedding days. Luckily, friends and family are often eager to help. Be sure to let them. Be honest about your own limitations and allow others to step in and help. A wedding is your day, but those who love you truly want to offer a supporting hand in the festivities. There’s nothing wrong with accepting that – in fact, it will probably help things go more smoothly.

Congrats to Megan and Etan, and special thanks to their wedding photographers, Lindsay and Sarah! 

 

{Partner Love + Giveaway} D.C.’s One Art Photography Wants To Win Your Heart & Reward You With FREE Wedding Photography

You guys. Ena at One Art Photography gets it. She gets your budget, she gets your wedding, she gets your unique love story and she gets your need to have all three of those work together. She went through the frustration of trying to find a good wedding photographer on a shoestring budget for her own wedding, and she wants to save you the grief.

Like a true Broke-Ass homie, One Art Photography is all about making it work for you. Comfort, style and flexibility are key for this Maryland and D.C. area biz. Whether you are all about the posed, super glam shots, or candid cuteness is more your speed, One Art Photography will be there to capture all the rad-tasticness of your wedding day.

And Ena gets it so well that she’s giving away an engagement and wedding shoot – because she knows a Broke-Ass loves nothing more than these four little letters: “FREE”.  Head on over to One Art’s Facebook page or blog and spill the beans on your most momentous moment as a couple. Did he make some grand, Lloyd Dobbler-like gesture? Was your proposal a story worthy of a viral video? Tell your story and get the chance to score a photo package worth $1300! Check her blog for the deets and good luck!

{Real Bride: Carrie} All The Pretty Pictures…(Or, Why I Opted To Hire A Pro Wedding Photographer)

Editor’s Note: Today, Carrie is dishing about the wedding photographer that made her change her mind about hiring a pro. I just wanted to take this opportunity to shout this from the rooftops – a professional wedding photographer is ALWAYS worth the splurge. (You’ll notice I said a “professional” wedding photographer. While hiring a newbie or handing the task over your cousin Buzz might save you a buttload of money, we can’t pretend there aren’t risks involved.)

At first we weren’t going to have a photographer.  We were convinced we couldn’t afford one and didn’t need one.  Some of our friends have dSLRs and we were hoping they would help us out. DIY photography all the way!

But then I got sucked into the world of wedding blogs and Pinterest.  I started feeling jealous of these couples I didn’t even know for their gorgeous photos!  My BFF strongly advised me that I would definitely regret not having a photographer.  I started feeling bad about the idea of asking our friends to don cameras on our big day.  Thus I secretly started looking around the web, “just to see what’s out there.”  “You don’t need a photographer!” the logical, thrifty side of my brain told me.  “But maybe, just maybe, if you could find one that’s not too expensive…” the other side whispered.

And that’s when I stumbled upon Bright Fizz Photo, based in Phoenix, Arizona.  “Wow,” I thought, as I perused the website, “These photos are so fun and quirky!”

copyright Bright Fizz Photo

Although I am normally annoyed when websites start blasting music at me, I actually really liked the songs playing in the background on Bright Fizz’s site.  More points for good taste in music!

copyright Bright Fizz Photo

Plus, Zach and I totally agree with their philosophy!  “Our style of photography is not traditional. We like the candid, silly moments that every couple has to offer. We do not like the standard poses with two people smiling at the camera. We create images that really show the style and connection of two people in love. Our style is happy with a little bit of funk.”

copyright Bright Fizz Photo

“So who is behind these awesome photos,” I wondered, “…and how can we possibly afford them?”  I sent an email to Rachel, the wonder-woman behind Bright Fizz.  It turns out that she and her husband Nick run the business and they both seem super awesome-sauce.  And, amazingly enough, they are AFFORDABLE!  (Basic wedding packages start at only $1500!)

copyright Bright Fizz Photo

I pretty much knew I NEEDED Rachel to photograph our wedding as soon as we talked.  So I turned to my parents and asked them if they’d be willing to gift us our wedding photography and they said yes!  I guess it’s kind of breaking the rule of paying for everything ourselves, but since Zach’s parents are providing our venue, my parents also really wanted to contribute something tangible.  This will make everyone happy!

copyright Bright Fizz Photo

We haven’t met Rachel in person yet, but we will definitely be doing that before the wedding.  For now though, her awesome photos and the personality that shines through her emails are enough to convince me she’s going to do a great job!  Wedding photo win!

Did anyone else decide they had to have a photographer after initially not wanting one?

{Ask Liz} No-Go For Photo Posts?

What? Only one question this week? Being afraid to ask isn’t going to get you anywhere, including down the aisle to the wedding you want. Go to the contact page and let us know what you need to know.

Yes. (Photos courtesy of Tim Coulson Photography)

Hey Liz,

I am getting married next week (Yay, Me!) and I am trying to figure out how to deal with social media. How do I ask my guests not to post pictures of my wedding on Facebook, Twitter, and the like. I’m fine with people posting pictures of themselves having a good time. It is a destination wedding after all. For sure, I draw the line at pictures of the bride and groom. The rest is a little fuzzy.

I have a fundamental problem with people posting about events/milestones that are not their own. Wedding season has been upon us for some time now and I have been appalled by the number of people posting photos of the bride and groom before the ink has dried on the marriage license. I think it’s rude and shows a lack of boundaries.

A wedding is a private intimate affair (which is why we are having a small 50 person wedding in the first place). I did not even change my status on Facebook because all the people who needed to know we were engaged were told in person. I would also like a little control over how, when, and if I announce to the world that I got married (OK, I get that I can’t control everything)… Don’t get me started on all the problems that come with flaunting a wedding in the faces of people who weren’t invited and the backlash that comes with that. I can really do without the confrontations of people who feel they should have been in the know or on the guest list.

Clearly this issue hits a nerve for me and I could go on. Your thoughts are greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Privacy Please

No.

Hey Privacy,

If having your wedding pictures posted on Facebook, etc. bugs you that much, then just ask them not to do it. Post a notice at the place card table, put a sign on each guest table, whatever it is that makes you feel that they have been properly notified. Make it clear that you’re only talking about posting pictures of the two of you, not of their family and friends.
HOWEVER, don’t count on total compliance, because you’re not going to get it. Legal issues aside- i.e. who actually owns the picture once it’s taken – it’s just human nature, and there’s only so much you can do. And, you’re going to give yourself a coronary if you worry about it too much, instead of enjoying the day itself as much as possible.
Are you okay with your photographer posting pics on THEIR Facebook page, though? That’s standard procedure these days, so if it’s a problem, you might want to check and talk with them about it.

So, what do you guys think? Do you have the same issue with wedding pics on social media, or do you have a completely different issue with it? Are you all about more being the merrier? Share below!

 

See you at the end of the aisle,

Real Wedding: Holly & Matthew’s Pub-tastic, English Seaside Scarborough Wedding

So there are weddings that look like WEDDINGS, with all the traditional signposts of weddingdom – poofy dress, big-ass veil, 3 tier wedding cake, matching b-maids all in a row…and then there are weddings that look like, hands down, the best party ever. Holly and Matthew’s shindig thankfully falls into the latter category – and they did it all with a budget of £3K  (Which, as of today’s posting, is $4,819 American). Their guests feasted on food truck fish n’ chips, were serenaded by the very musical bride and her entire fam, and enjoyed the couple’s fave tunes on vinyl in between sets, all while downing (what I can only imagine to be) copious amounts of tea and pints at the couple’s favorite pub. Sound like your kind of party? Read on! 

Your names: Holly and Matthew

Occupations:

Holly – musician – namely singer pianist (femalepianistsinger.com) and songwriter/artiste

Matthew – sailing yacht skipper

Wedding location: Scarborough, North Yorkshire, UK

Wedding date: 3rd December 2011

Wedding budget: £3000

Approximate guest count: 94 in day, 130 evening

How would you describe your wedding? English seaside with an almost retro-feel, but here’s the catch – it wasn’t even SUPPOSED to be retro, it’s just that so many of the elements of the day – fish n chips van, seaside bus tour where the driver has no mic so says his patter downstairs then runs to the upper deck to tell the guests up there the same patter, pointing out signposts to them that were once on the television. Scarborough is a beautiful seaside town and was in its hey-day in Victorian times when it was Queen Victoria’s favourite place to come on holiday. There’s a spa here that’s alleged to have healing powers.

Today, Scarborough is still a very popular seaside resort but in December when it’s completely out of season there’s something very eerie and dated and brilliant about it. Our guests from out of town thought this was a retro and quirky touch, but this is just Scarborough on a budget!

As Matthew is South African we also put a few touches of South Africa in there too – mainly in some Lady Smith Black Mambazo music choices during the signing of the register and as a surprise I also sang in the evening after my speech N Kosi Sike Lel iAfrika – the South African National Anthem, complete in 5 languages and 2 keys! So basically – English (Accidental Retro) Seaside with flavours of South Africa.

What was your favorite part of your wedding?

Walking down the isle with my dad, seeing Matthew looking so handsome in his suit all by himself up the front because his best man didn’t know he was supposed to wait with him.

Having no money for a band so making it up ourselves – my dad sang the first dance, I sang the second! Even Matthew and his friends from their ‘sixth form band’ days got up and played some songs (after about 15 rum and cokes for the courage!)

What did you splurge on?

The photography! Matthew being from South Africa has a lot of family and friends out there that couldn’t make it so we thought splurge on having the best photography so they could get as best feel as possible as to what the day was like. I don’t think I need to say that York Place Studios MORE than succeeded in this!

What did you save on?

Everything else!! The food – we got in a fish n chip van and just hired a venue that could seat everyone (just about) and the people from the van came in and took orders and brought it to your table. Even the dessert we skimped on because we have so many apple trees in our garden we got the venue to make apple crumble and custard but knocked them down on price even more by saying that we would provide the apples!!

We also saved on the music. I’m a professional musician, my dad is, my uncle is, so many of my friends are. The guy who ran the pub was a mate and a musician mate of mine and he set up an acoustic line up and whoever and himself did the live music. It was in my local pub so it wasn’t a huge hall that looked empty if nobody was dancing. It was just so perfect.

We refused on a DJ or even a playlist – we simply took our vinyl player down and a few records (Motown Trilogy, Fleetwood Mac early stuff, Stevie Wonder, Van Morrison – Astral Weeks) and so in between live music, we’d play full albums. It’s amazing what difference it makes to an atmosphere when you play a whole record through instead of skipping to genre to genre every other song. It builds!

We saved on the evening food also because our friends offered – as their wedding gift to us, to sort out the evening food. We gave them literally the cost ingredients and they sorted everything! It was amazing.

We saved on a wedding car because my brother works very high up in Mercedes and they lent him a Mark something that looked amazing and he chauffeured us around!

We saved on wine with the meal by having fish n’ chips so wine doesn’t really fit! Instead we asked people to bring tea pots and bought a load of mis-matching china tea cups from charity shops and so we had fish n chips and tea! Very Yorkshire! Very English!

We saved on even the welcome champagne by having ‘champagne cocktails’ and because me and Matthew had been living on a boat in France before the wedding we smuggled back a load of French brandy, which was considerably less expensive than buying it in the UK. This meant we could buy cheaper sparkling wine as it was just to mix with the brandy, and we sugar frosted the glasses so it looked all nice! They were lethal in their alcohol content but much cheaper than just normal champagne and more interesting I think too! Especially for a winter wedding!

Was there anything you would have done differently, in retrospect?

In all honesty – not a thing.

What was your biggest challenge in planning?

Fitting all the guests into the relatively small venues! At the registry office itself I think we had 60 people sitting, which is supposed to be their legal maximum and we had at least 30 people standing!


 What lessons did you learn from planning or from the wedding itself? That it’s STRESSFUL! No matter how much we tried to make it a relaxed affair, it’s unbelievably stressful. I had endless nightmares of turning up to the ceremony and they were playing ‘I Feel It In My Fingers’ by Wet Wet Wet as my entrance song instead of ‘Sweet Thing’ by Van Morrison that we had chosen! Or that my dog was at the ceremony weeing all over everywhere and the registrar was shouting at me to have her under control!

What were your top 5 favorite things about your wedding?

Walking down the aisle.

The music we chose for the day in both the ceremony and the evening.

My birdcage veil and my dress.

Having everyone you love in one place all together.

Making those vows.

Top 5 least favorite?

The stress in the build up!

The awkward invitations – having to invite certain people, not being able to invite others.

How cold it was when we were having our photographs done by the sea after the ceremony.(even though they look lovely, we were freeeeeeeeeeezing!!!).

The fact that I got so snappy with people that were only trying to help in the build up – I’m just not a wedding plannery kind of gal!

Hen do (Editor’s note: aka the bachelorette party)  – I refused to have one but was talked around to having a ‘sleepover’ with just a few friends. I’m not really a drinker at all but was forced to drink chili vodka and then proceeded to dry-wretch on the lawn more out of panic of having drunk chilli vodka than the effects of the drink itself. I got so hot and bothered I had to take nearly all my clothes off (in November in Yorkshire!) and sit outside while my friend told me ‘it’s OK, I cried on my hen do too. Don’t even know why! I think there’s something wrong if you don’t end up upset and crying for no good reason!

What was the worst piece of wedding advice you received?

Nobody particularly dared give us any advice! I think someone tried to suggest to Matthew he ought wear Top and Tails because you only get to do it once, but I think he only had to see Matthew’s facial reaction to soon realise not to pursue the suggestion…

The best?

Like I say, nobody really tried to! Although I think it was my mum’s idea to shuttle the guests around from the different venues (there were 3 in total) in the seaside tours bus which everyone really did get a kick out of! I loved seeing everyone getting out of that bus – apparently there was a lot of banter on board too!

Please be sure to include a list of all vendors, with links!

Photography – York Place Studios

Flowers and decorations – Minnie Bees Floral Design

Music – Me!

Food – Mobile Fish and Chips of Pickering – tel: +44 (0)7536008741

Shuttle Bus for guests – Shoreline Cruiser Buses

Ugh, did you get a little misty reading this? I sure as hell did. I laughed (hen do hilarity!), I cried (at basically everything, because it was all so lovely!), I felt like I was right there, pint in hand. Our heartfelt congrats to Holly and Matthew – if your travels ever bring you stateside, pints are on me! And thanks to the fabulous York Place Studios for sharing these amazing photos.