6/6 Real Bride Danielle: Something Old and Something Borrowed

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Keepsake box from Etsy Seller mariaallenboutique

Tradition recommends a bride have something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue as she goes down the aisle. I’ve been throwing tradition to the wind all Willy Nilly the entire time but this one gives me pause. Four items — how hard can that be? Famous last words.

Obviously the something new is easy enough. Essentially everything I’m wearing is new: Dress, shoes, jewelry … all of that has been purchased expressly for the wedding. Something blue is also not an issue at all: My colors are navy and sunflower, so I could tie blue in anywhere. My shoes will be blue and the stone in my ring is blue as well.

Something new and blue, check.

Where I’m currently struggling is something borrowed and something old. My mother didn’t save her wedding dress when she got married because she knew neither my sister or I would fit in it when we were old enough to be married. My sister and I hit that size in our youth. So there goes that idea. While Michael’s mother probably still has her wedding dress, it is from her second marriage. You don’t realize you have a superstition until it stares you in the face. So that’s out.

One of my girlfriends has offered to let me borrow an apron her mother made her for her wedding day to wear while she eats BBQ. While I have no fears of spilling BBQ on a white dress, it is likely a good idea. But, I’m not going to be wearing it when I go down the aisle, so maybe it doesn’t count? I’m pretty much fully decked out already, what else can I possibly add to what I’m wearing/carrying for this old borrowed stuff? I don’t have a garter, I’m not really sure I want one. We aren’t having a garter toss and I doubt Michael will even care if I have one, let’s be real. Also, borrowing one of those seems a bit icky, not really sure how I feel about that.

I have seen some brides wrap family heirlooms or scraps of fabric in their bouquets to help incorporate items. Neither of my parents really have any pieces of fabric that are important enough to borrow. My grandmother on my mom’s side was married three different times, so I don’t want anything from her. My father’s mother (and father) have already passed away so I can’t ask them. Of my assorted aunts and uncles on both sides, none of their first marriages lasted. Oy vey.

My stuffed bro Pango

I have a stuffed toy that I’ve had since birth. I’m not really wild about cutting a piece of him off to take with me, but I could steal a bit of his stuffing I suppose. He’s a bit too big to bring with me down the aisle.

I feel like I’m spinning my wheels on something that, ultimately, doesn’t really matter. It would be nice to do, but maybe I’m just wasting my time on something pointless.

Has anyone else had this problem? Thoughts? Suggestions?

  • Emily B

    OOH. I just went through this same thing–blue and new were no problem, old and borrowed were. I’m going to attach rings from both of my (now deceased) grandmothers on my bouquet, and then give them back to my parents afterwards. Old and borrowed–BAM. I haven’t figured out how I’m going to attach them, though (hidden pin? loop them through something and tie that on?).

    I wouldn’t get hung up on the fabric idea. There are plenty of things you can borrow and attach to your bouquet or an inside hem of your dress in one way or another. Think about people not related to you whose marriages you admire, or something non-wedding-related from your family. When my mother was looking for these rings for me, she found these weird things called “baby rings” that belonged to my grandmother as well–I would have used those if she couldn’t find the adult-sized rings. Baby rings are family-related, but might not give you the bad juju you associate with the wedding trappings of your family.

    Good luck!

  • So tough. I was lucky that my friend gave me something borrowed (french perfume) because I was really struggling!