Ask a Broke-Ass is Back!
Its time for another exciting installment of Ask a Broke-Ass! (insert kitschy theme music here) And away we goooooo……
My partner and I are both college students so we are trying to stay as cheap as possible. Plus I don’t see the point in wasting all that paper…Do you think it’s inappropriate to send out postcard wedding invites?
Sure, why not? Sure, your Aunt Edna may scoff at it, but guess what? IT AIN’T HER WEDDING – its yours! You can do what you like 
I knew a couple who sent adorable postcard invites! They did their own version of the ipod ads with their silhouettes and white headphone cords on the front, and the back was set up like an iPhone screen with the relevant info and their wedding website address. I loved it!
How did you develop your writing style and blog sense?
I was born with it, yo! *wink*
I basically write like I talk, but smarter and funnier (I hope). And ballsier. I write my best self, the one I’m sometimes shy to share in person (but I’m working on it!). Does that make sense? Its all authentically me, though. All Dana, all the time
I developed my blog sense by drinking in as much bloggy goodness as possible. I saw what others did and I learned from it. From the successes and failures I see in other blogs. And I still am doing it, I never stop learning, plotting, revising, etc. Its a lot of trial and error. Lots of firing bullets with one hand over my eyes. Sometimes I fail, and try again. Sometimes I win! (I like winning).
If you’re trying to find your own voice, I have two pieces of advice:
1. Be yourself. Authentically, genuinely you. No one does it better
2. Write write and write some more. The more you do, the more you’ll find your voice and the courage to let it sing loud and proud!
What was your favorite wedding accessory?
My fly-ass husband, yo!
Ok, I know that’s not what you were looking for, but its the truth
I loved my dress more than words can tell. But I also loved my headpiece and earrings, my shrug, my bouquet and my shoes a whole lot. BUT the wifey pimp cup? That one was balls out awesome.
In conclusion, while everything I wore made my heart sing, my husband was the best accessory of all.
How do you slow down and find balance on days that feel just completely overwhelming? What do you do to cope and take control again?
GREAT question! And one that I still haven’t perfected the answer to… yet.
When I am completely overwhelmed and I feel like I’m drowning, the following things help:
1. Make a list of all there is to do
2. Prioritize it as much as I can
3. Do the 2 easiest things just to be able to cross them off. Even if #1 is “make a list”
Other great things that help me:
1. Take a 10 minute break and get away from my desk. Outside if possible. Even if I feel I don’t have the time to spare, just getting fresh air and a change of scenery can really help with my mindset.
2. Changing up my music. Something productive and happy can help me shift my perspective.
3. List 10 things I’m grateful for (especially good for when overwhelmed = blue)
4. Take a day off. I know a day off for a business owner is pretty different from that of a 9-5er, but just gifting myself with the time and freedom to see a movie or have girlfriend time over a manicure can really improve my mental health.
5. Exercise. Again, I never feel like I have time. But even just 20 minutes for the Shred can really clear my head and make me feel in control of myself again.
6. Ask for help. Hunter helps me so much, and I’d be lost without him. But asking for help is sometimes the last thing that occurs to me when I’m stressed! Go fig…
Hope this helps! Good luck!
What is the recipe of your most favorite healthy meal to cook at home?
Oh, man – there are so many, and yet, most of them are originals without recipes. We’re the kind of cooks who throw something together based on what’s around, usually.
But, I happen to LOVE this easy, peas-y soup. Its a snap to make, super healthy, and leaves guests wowed:
Chilled, Minted Pea Soup!
*3 cups frozen green peas
*2 cups vegetable stock
*handful of fresh mint leaves
*salt/pepper to taste
*juice of 1/2 lemon or lime (optional)
Put all the ingredients into your blender, hit GO, and let it all be pureed into a delicious delight. If you’re feeling extra fancy, strain it, but its good either way.
Garnish with a few mint leaves and a dollop of creme fraiche (if you’re extra fancy), throw a hunk of crusty bread with some olive oil on the side, and enjoy the flavor party in your mouth!
Your ability to put yourself out there is very inspiring. What is your biggest motivator?
Desperation. Seriously. Pretty simple.
I’m DESPERATE to give myself the gift of the life I’ve always dreamt of. Desperate to get out of my dayjob doldrums. Desperate to be creative for a living. To be heard. To get out of debt. To be fulfilled. To make a difference. To inspire others. TO CHANGE THE WORLD.
I can’t tolerate the alternative of always wondering “What if?”, so I use all of that desperation and turn it into motivation to take the bull by the horns and lay my balls on the table to make it happen. Life is for living!
Don’t get me wrong. Its scary as hell. I get butterflies in my stomach. I get nauseous with fear. I procrastinate. I fret. I cry. But at the end of the day, I push myself to do the scary things because that’s when change happens. I go to sleep proud, because I didn’t let the fear paralyze me. Instead, I made it work for me. I took control. Whether I win or lose the goal I’m working toward, I always win the self-respect that comes with trying as hard as I can… balls to the walls.
At first it felt like pretend. I was ACTING brave, but it felt like a mask. But over the years I’ve realized it was always in me… I just needed to exercise that muscle and welcome it in. Now I can’t see myself living any other way!
I see friends and colleagues stuck. Inert. Stagnate. And they’re miserable. But they don’t do anything. They don’t affect change because they’re too busy waiting for life to happen to them. It makes me so sad, because I’ve been there too. I just want to shake them awake and help them. But people can’t be helped unless they’re ready to help themselves. That lesson, I’m still learning.
I spent 25 years waiting for life to happen to me. I’ve always been ballsy and took risks, but only sometimes and always in soulquaking fear. In opposition, I spent many years paralyzed in self-doubt, fear, and misery… hoping for something to change. Little did I know what needed changing was my attitude! I try to look back on those times with gentle eyes, and see how going through that helped me build up what I needed to turn around…. but I also look back on that time as life lost. And that burns.
So I resolved to actively participate in the change of my life, and every day I step into and through my fear to reach that goal. Because I’m absolutely desperate to make it happen.
