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Getting Good at Life: A Mightier Me

As 2011 rambles ever-steadily on toward December 31st, the pressure of a new year is just around the corner. This makes me particularly anxious, because my aquarian ass knows my birthday is just around the corner from New Years, and that makes January is a double-whammy of NEW. There’s twice the… potential… in the air. Annual opportunities for fresh beginnings and second chances. Redemption, if you will. (and I do.) So I throw on my fancy instropection hat (oh, it’s cute, don’t worry) and take a good hard look at where I’ve been, where I am, and where I’m going.  And, inevitably, I’m kindatotallysomewhatvery disappointed with how little I accomplished in the previous year. I just never seem to get enough done.

Throughout my life, I’ve kept a mental “List”: things I desperately want to experience or accomplish before I’m done. Some that I’ve put voice to publicly, some I confessed to loved ones privately, and some which have emerged from the recesses of my imagination and tethered themselves relentlessly to my heart. It’s a work-in-progress, but each item on it is rooted deeply in my intention and speaks for my essence… my innate Dana-ness.

I was inspired to put mine to paper last year after reading Maggie’s blog and Mighty Life List. And this year, when Meg told me that Maggie would be hosting a weekend retreat in Palm Springs called Camp Mighty, I knew what I had to do. From their site:

Camp Mighty is a retreat for people who like to make cool stuff. If you’re one of those people, you should come. We can talk about getting good at life. We’re here to live better…get smarter…do gooder.

…Camp Mighty is a weekend structured around skills. The objective is to improve your life until it cannot be further improved.

And our Life Lists are the starting place. OH AND THERE’S A SPACE CAMP PARTY, WITH ANTI-GRAVITY. Holy crap, you guys… “experience anti-gravity” was already ON my Life List. I couldn’t not go.

So I am going.

Part of the “Doing Gooder” aspect is that each camper is asked to raise or donate $200 to Charity: Water a non-profit organization bringing clean and safe drinking water to people in developing nations. 100% of public donations directly fund projects to help bring clean water to those that don’t have it.  Currently 1 billion people across the planet don’t have access to clean drinking water.  If I raise $200, everyone who donated will have helped 10 people get access to clean water, and if my team reaches our goal of $5000, we will all have helped build a well for an entire village. Collectively, all Mighty Campers will be raising $20k to bring clean drinking water to the needy. Check it out:

So go ahead and donate. Treat yourself to a hit of Do-Gooder seratonin, and wallow blissfully in some warm fuzzies, knowing you helped make that happen.

Or, if warm fuzzies aren’t enough: each person who donates a minimum of $10 to my team’s Charity:Water fund until I reach my goal, will be the dubiously lucky recipient of an original, personalized haiku poem, from me to you, and a video of me reciting it. I write a mean haiku, people. Get you some.

CLICK HERE TO MAKE A DONATION ***and be sure to list my name in the comment box at the bottom of the page, near the donate amount field, so we can track that you donated through BAB (& if I owe you a haiku!)***

Camp Mighty is next weekend, and in preparation I’ve been revising my list, and laying groundwork toward some of the goals to try and get a head start. Spending a weekend with like-minded people, soaking up inspiration, and organizing my priorities sounds like just what the doctor ordered. A good, motivational kick in the pants before 2012 smacks me in the face. (Well, that… and space camp. I mean, let’s be real.)

I’ll be sure to report on how it goes!

…and if you’re interested in what’s on my Life List, you can read it here.

Breaking up is hard to do.

Nahhhh, its not what you think. But, that doesn’t make it hurt any less. And I just need to talk it out.

I recently made the unbearably difficult choice to “break up with” one of my very best friends. It’s the first time in my adult life that I’ve been faced with having to willfully separate from someone whom I loved deeply (and still do) and shared a great deal of intimacy with, yet was never a romantic partner. It’s the longest relationship I’ve ever dissolved.

But after nine years of that kind of closeness, it hurts worse than most of my romantic break-ups in the past.

When the scales of a relationship that’s endured over many years and through vast experiences tip in favor of “for worse”, it’s very hard to know when to say when. In the past, I’ve allowed far too much “worse” to pervade my life in the name of averting conflict, or fear of loss, or weakness of will or confidence or strength. It’s all too easy to confuse loyalty with leaving yourself behind… to blur the line between curable and terminal… or to hide behind the guise of unconditional love to avoid confronting how utterly, devastatingly conditional it has actually become. I guess this is kind of a big step for me, in that I honored my boundaries more fully than I have in the past and put my well-being first, in saying “this ‘worse’ has gone too far”. I wish I felt better about that realization, but I don’t.

And this particular decision goes much further than the dissolution of a friendship. It also marks the death of a project that both Hunter and I, alongside our friend, had been pouring energy, creativity and love into for the past two years. It’s the demise of a partnership we’ve been building up far longer than that. The promise of that potential, the fantasy of our future, all the magic we were manifesting… it all went poof –compounding my grief and disappointment and sense of loss in deeper, more existential ways than I imagined. My heart is… its just broken. There’s no way around that truth, unexpected though it may be. And the mourning period is…. arduous.

There is still a corner of this heart holding out a deeply resonant prayer that someday in the future, there can be repair. That, despite the broken trust, the burning words, and all the unfair fallout –that given space, growth, healing and evolution– we’ll find a way back to each other and mend our friendship to be stronger than before. It seems impossible to me that nine years of so much shared intimacy and experience can just implode, dissolve and vanish into thin air.

This experience creates so much fear in me. We tend to think of our relationships with those we love and trust and invest into over many years as permanent. My love for this friend is like a tattoo on my heart, and while for the time being it is necessary to remove him from my life for both of our sakes, nothing can undo the history, the love, and the undeniable wish I have for the way our friendship used to be.

Mannnnn. Growing up is overrated, and relationships are hard, yo. Am I alone here, or have any of you had a similar experience?

On Growing Pains & Leaps of Faith

Hi, my name is Dana and I am constantly fighting against myself to make myself do the things that I fear most.

I have lots o’ friends and family members who go through life avoiding things that scare them – or worse – are paralyzed by their fears and thus only fulfill a small portion of their potential, because they’d prefer to not try, rather than try and risk failure. That is, to me, a fate worse than death.

Source: bootsandcateyes.blogspot.com via The Broke-Ass Bride on Pinterest

Now I’m not saying its easy. Oh no no no, not at all, young grasshopper. Sometimes, it takes me years of stutter-starts, excuses, or just plain old hiding out before I build up the gumption to fight through a fear. In truth, there are some fears I wonder if I’ll ever fully conquer. But part of my personal mission is to constantly evaluate what’s holding me back, and to find actionable ways to vanquish the beast. It keeps me from sinking into passive mediocrity. It keeps me growing and evolving.

Two years ago, Hunter, I and our bestie Nick began dreaming up a TV show, and started slowly writing, sketching it out and building out the world of the story. It was casual and organic, and since the show is kind of clearly about us, we got to poke a lot of fun at ourselves along the way. We had a great time. It came very easily.

Nick has worked in television for the past 5 years, under the tutelage of one of the sitcom world’s most profound directors on the sets of tons of great sitcom shows. He’s also just about the most likeable guy on the planet. So, when we started bandying about the idea of shooting the script ourselves, his coworkers and cast members generously and eagerly offered their assistance to help Nick make his (and our) dreams come true.

So, here we are today, a month away from shooting our first scene of our pilot episode, leading a team of Hollywood veterans whose resumes boast such titles as Cheers, Will & Grace, The Sopranos, Gary UnMarried and more. And we’re four days away from a giant fundraising party to help make it all possible. And we’re learning how to do it all as we go along.

So, as you can imagine, its a bit overwhelming, totally scary, and a whole lotta awesome.

Mostly, I’m just fighting through the fear. Focusing on the positive. Making myself do the things that are most uncomfortable and foreign because it strengthens me as an artist and businessperson, and I’m learning a LOT along the way.

Source: fitandhungry.com via The Broke-Ass Bride on Pinterest

It’s just like planning a wedding. It’s not something most brides have experience in doing before they’re thrown into the fire. There are elements that are scary and feel near-impossible (negotiating with vendors and in-laws, anyone?). You worry about money, and timing, and details and the big picture. You worry about the “mights” and “what if’s”, and at times you just want to throw in the towel and run off to elope, because your To Do list is multiplying in its sleep, and you can’t imagine a world in which you can possibly pull all this off and still have the strength to walk down the aisle when the big day finally comes….

…But somehow, it happens. Things fall into place. You force your way through the fear and trepidation, the moments of paralysis and bi-weekly weepy meltdowns. You lean on your team for help. You learn how to do things you never imagined yourself being good at, and surprise yourself when you realize that not only are you pretty good at it, but you actually kind of enjoy it. And at the end of the day (or planning period), you reap the benefits of plowing through your fears, and growing through your pains, by sharing in the creation of something spectacular with the people that you love the most.

This is what I mean when I talk about how wedding planning can be a launchpad for your life. Having been through the fire, and with the hindsight the past two years since, I am continually amazed by how much the process of our wedding planning has informed the kind of artist and businesswoman that I am, and shaped the way I approach my future. Not without fear, but through fear. And it makes me feel pretty bad-ass, I gotsta say.

So, yeah, I’ve been thinking a lot, over the past few weeks, how grateful I am for having planned our own wedding and for this blog as a space to explore what that means to me. I have shifted and grown more in the past three years than in most of my previous years, because of those things. I’ve learned to turn a “what if I fail” mindset into a “what if I succeed” mantra. And here I am today, making a television show with my friends and the trust of industry pros. I’m not gonna lie. That makes me feel pretty darn fancy and seriously proud.

Has planning your wedding helped you grow in ways you never imagined before? I’d love to know how!

DANA’S SURGERY WAS A SUCCESS!!! (A Hubby Tells All)

The sun had just risen as our alarm sang out, “Get the heck up! You need to be at the hospital by 7am!!!” (Our alarm clock believes in tough love). Surgery day had arrived. I had no idea what was happening, but fortunately before bed I had ingrained it into my psyche that I would thrust my body out of bed, put my pants on, walk the dog, and fling the wife into the car. We were off to make the journey across town to U.C.L.A. but first to pick up our buddy Nick O. He was awesome enough to keep me company during the longest hours a hubby can have.

We were driving down the 405 before rush hour even had a chance to catch us. We zoomed into U.C.L.A. (actually on time!) and Dana started filling out some pre-surgery paperwork. And within moments they sent me off to the waiting room. Why they won’t let me stay with Dana as they prep her I may understand, but I will never appreciate. I wanted to be there to talk to the anesthesiologist to discuss the options when  medicating Dana (last time her blood pressure kept dropping dangerously low, while the pain was intolerable… oh, and she kept puking all day from the meds. FUN!)

Once I was allowed to re-join Dana, she told me she had discussed the plan with the anesthesiologist and everything should be fine. And within moments, they were wheeling my wife away. I kissed her and told her I love her as the doors to the O.R. swung open, just as they have done so many times before.  The nurses pushed Dana down the hall and I watched as my wife became smaller and smaller until the O.R. doors shut, just as they have done so many times before. This is when I always have that momentary thud in my gut, but there is no choice but to shake it off and find something that will distract.

This is actually a pic from the last surgery, but even that pink spot on the ground is still there.

oof.

Nothing distracts like food. So Nick and I are off to The Corner Bakery to grab something really indulgent. Egg sandwich with bacon, cheese and avacado? Yes, please and thank you. “To go please. We would stay, but we have a quite little chalet at U.C.L.A. called The Waiting Room that is ironically waiting for us.” It’s tight, windowless and stuffy in the waiting room, but overall it’s pretty pleasant… until we reach that moment. That moment when you realize the surgery should be over and the doctor should come around the corner at any moment… but he doesn’t.

And… then… he… DOES! He tells me everything went well. That they removed the old implant and successfully replaced it with a new one (Which he had NEVER DONE BEFORE!!! Since Dana was one of the first to ever take part in this procedure, she is one of the first to ever have the old implant removed to make room for a new one.) .

My poor little patch girl.

Eventually they let me see Dana. She is asleep, but when she wakes she is in horrible pain. The nurse doesn’t want to give her more drugs, but I explain to them that we’ve done this before and the pain gets worse with each procedure. The nurse is worried that Dana will stop breathing. While Dana is barely conscious she murmers, “I’ll keep breathing, I promise.” (Have I mentioned how much I love my wife.) The anesthesiologist comes in and signs some papers, which makes the skies part and the big drugs show up. They put it in Dana’s drip and she is out like a light. She sleeps for another hour and when I wake her she is in a much better state. It takes a while, but we get her dressed and wheel her to the car.

Even half asleep, Dana is gangsta in my Pirates of The Caribbean shirt from our Disney anniversary celebration the day before.

We’ve done it. We’re out of the hospital! Dana calls her parents and then resumes the activity she will do all day (and the majority of the following 4 days). She sleeps and sleeps and sleeps. She wakes up for a moment in the car and demands a Diet Coke. Yup, everything is going to be O.K.

You can cut her and drug her but you can’t keep her from her Diet Coke.

Today, Dana is far from fully operational, but she is doing well and we’ve been catching up on some much needed t.v. and movie watching. Last night we even went to see Prince! My wife is the ultimate trooper. Dana went from lying on the couch and the bed 24/7, to rocking a patch amongst 17,000 people in the middle of the Los Angeles Forum. It was a definite strain but she paced herself and fortunately, just like magical Dolphins, Prince has the ability to cure all ailments (at least momentarily.)

Our thanks goes out to the amazing staff at U.C.L.A., who not only are incredibly talented, but were incredibly warm and caring in our most fragile moments. We also owe so much thanks for all the support we have received from our amazing peeps, like you! I am happy to say that in its last days Dishing For Dana is going gangbusters. There are still a couple of days to bid on some amazing deals offered by some amazing companies in our Dishing For Dana auction. Check them out here.

Thank you so much to all of you for all your well wishes, donations and love. It means more than you can ever know.

Healthcare Nightmare (a rant)

I’ve been crying on and off all morning. I freaking HATE the medical system right now. I want to move to canada, or sweden. Because this just ain’t working for me anymore, and I just need to write it out to try and feel a little better.

Yesterday, my surgical coordinator called to tell me the hospital pharmacy is refusing to order my $18,000 drug implant because of “some problem with insurance”. Of course, she didn’t have any more detail than that at the time. Of course, I’ve been paying out the nose for my own insurance for the past year. Of course, I’ve had this exact surgery like seven times before, with no problem. Of course, they’ve had TWO MONTHS to get this shit settled in advance. But here I am, two weeks before my surgery, totally blindsided by this news.

Today, she called to say that there will be at least another 48 hour delay in approval, and the drug takes 2-3 weeks to be delivered, so yeah…. its probable that my surgery (which I’ve been planning my LIFE around for the past 2 months) will be delayed.

So I called my insurance company. They say, “we have no idea what the problem is. Your hospital called, requesting pre-authorization on the implant… but this surgery doesn’t require it. Maybe they’re upset because we can’t guarantee benefits in advance, but as long as they submit the claim correctly and provide backup, it will be paid – just like your other surgeries were”. SO WHAT’S THE FREAKING PROBLEM?!?!?

I am waiting for the director of UCLA’s pharmacy to return my call and explain just exactly WHAT the problem is and WHAT RIGHT do they have to REFUSE my implant order when I am a FULLY INSURED United States citizen who depends on this surgery to preserve MY ABILITY TO FREAKING SEE. I am waiting for my surgeon to get out of the OR and call me back so I can demand to know how this happened, and have him explain to me what he’s able to do to make it right. Because, surely, someone has to be able to do something. Right now, it seems no one is doing anything.

But waiting is not my strong suit.

I am a proactive person. I like to make shit happen. This situation is like wearing a straight jacket, a blindfold, earplugs and a strip of duct tape over my mouth. I am unable to do anything to help the situation. I am castrated. I am useless. And I don’t cotton well to feeling impotent, especially in matters concerning my healthcare. So instead, I alternate crying with fits of anger, and intensely staring at my phone like if I concentrate hard enough it will ring with the words “good news, its all cleared up, and they’re rushing your implant here on time after all.”

But it doesn’t ring. I am not, much to my chagrin, telekinetic.

Please please please send good healthcare and patience and love vibes to me. I need all that I can get at the moment.

Thanks.

Phew, that feels a little better. I’ll keep you posted.

PS – Dishing for Dana is over $10,600 today. You guys are SUCH bad-asses, and you lift my spirits in ways beyond expression

Dishing for Dana (or: we need your help)

Bear with me here, this is the hardest post I’ve ever had to write. But it is also the most important, so please take the time to read it. I ain’t gonna lie: its long. (If you really need to cut to the chase, click here.)

For most of my adult life, I’ve lived with chronic autoimmune diseases that require frequent surgery (I’ve had 11 operations in the past 9 years) and regular ongoing care. It is the primary reason we’re Broke-Ass. You can read all about it here, and here, and here, and here. (or get the short version, here.) Being creative artists in a small business start-up, we are nowhere near a place to pay down the bills we’ve accrued as a result. The debt looms large and heavy over our lives and limit what we can do with the money we make. Its impossible to rationalize investing our earnings back into our business when the credit card bill is overdue and compounding interest, and the collections man is on the phone again. It is not a matter of fiscal irresponsibility, its simply that we are a struggling by-product of a broken system working over my broken body.

Don’t you wish your broke-ass was hot like me?

Recently, my doctor confirmed my fears. My left eye has come out of remission and they’ll need to implant another time-release capsule of drugs to control the inflammation for another 3 years or so. Yup, I will be undergoing my 12th surgery. The implant alone costs $18,000. Luckily, I have good (read: expensive) insurance, but it only covers a portion of my expenses, so there will be plenty of overage and my debt will compound once again. To tide me over until the surgery, they gave me an injection of steroids in the eye to reduce the inflammation and clear up my vision.

At least it’s better than a sharp stick in the eye… oh wait.

My medical debt is just one small portion of our overall debt (thanks to student loans, which are thankfully much more manageable to work with) but due to the frequency of my surgeries, the interest on the money we already owe, and the insanely high premiums to keep myself well-insured for future health care, there’s no end in sight. It’s overwhelming and the situation just keeps getting bigger and holds us back more and more.

Ironically, I owe many debts of gratitude to my disease and debt… because without them, this site would have never existed. It was born out of necessity when I found myself engaged and broke. When I started this site almost 3 years ago, we never fathomed that it would grow into this. I know that living with this illness has made me a much stronger, more resilient, creative and compassionate person than I would have been otherwise. I know that it has inspired me to push harder, dream bigger, and live more passionately than I would have otherwise. And I know that I have it to thank for the creation of this site, and the community is has built. And I am grateful.

The birth of the Broke-Ass Brand was organic and honest and community-driven, and we still cannot believe how far it has come. It has allowed me the freedom to pursue a creative career that complements my passions as a writer and performer, and I discover potential in myself and in the future of our business every day that inspires awe and motivation within me that I’ve never known before. It grew demanding enough to become my full-time job and has 9 amazing people working for peanuts (or less) to keep it afloat every day. But our sole income is from sponsorships, and we are not yet profitable as a business. But we’re close. Oh, so close.

It would break my heart to have to give this all up and go back into a cubicle just to fund my health care and surgery habit. And I think (I hope) that you all feel the same way. Whenever I hear from brides who need help, or who we have inspired… from vendors and companies who support us or fortify their business through partnership with us… from people who root us on from the sidelines of life, even if they have no interest in weddings at all…. these interactions fill my heart with pride and joy in ways beyond expression. We have big dreams for the Broke-Ass Brand. BIG ‘UNS. But we can’t grow or improve any more without your help.

Over the years, friends and strangers alike have offered to throw us a fundraiser of one kind or another. As much as it warmed our hearts, we were uncomfortable with accepting the help… even though we needed it. We just couldn’t say yes. But as time passed, and the “surgery toll” rose, and the debt grew… we thought maybe there’s a way we could produce something to offer in exchange for donations.

The Solution

Announcing…. Dishing for Dana: bad-ass bloggers cooking comforts for a cause! (cue uproarious applause)
Our (amazing) friends in the online community have encouraged us to hold an online fundraiser, but receiving without giving isn’t really our jam. To that end…
♥  We’re compiling beloved comfort food recipes and the stories behind them from the most bad-ass bloggers and beyond… available in varying forms, in exchange for donations to my medical care.
♥  There are incentives for varying levels of donation, which you can learn about here.
♥  The recipes, photos and stories will be teased on our Dishing for Dana blog, and once a donation is processed, a password to access the full recipe database will be released to each donor.

The Goal
♥  $13,000 to cover my current medical bills
♥  $7,000 to cover our health insurance premiums for the remainder of 2011
♥  $2,000 to donate to the American Autoimmune Related Disease Association toward helping others with autoimmune disease
For a total minimum of $22,000.

***This does not include the costs that will be related to my upcoming surger(ies) and ongoing care, nor for prescriptions or post-surgical supplies***

Asking for this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I know times are tight for everyone. I know there’s tragedy in the world. I know you all have your own debt, and disease, and problems, and lives. But I believe that with your help, we can achieve enough financial freedom to continue improving this site, pay the people who lend their talents to our business, launch our lifestyle site, and revamp Bride$hare to all be bad-ass resources that will inspire people to spend wisely, live richly and thrive creatively, improving countless lives.

How you can help
♥  We need donations. Every little bit counts and is so appreciated. What is my healthcare and the health of The Broke-Ass Brand worth to you? Could you skip a cup of coffee at Starbucks today? Could you pack your own lunch for a week at work? Could you donate a little now, and a little later? We’ve made the payment process simple and flexible, and even a $1 donation is a buck more than we had yesterday. We’ve created fun incentives to reward donors at certain levels, which you can learn about here.

♥  We need HYPE. Please help us spread the word in any way you can. We have incentives for you, too! Anyone who blogs about the project will be linked to in a post here, linked to in the sidebar of our Dishing for Dana Blog and also receive a credit in the acknowledgments of the book. If you don’t have a blog, but can email, facebook or tweet about it to your network, we’ll credit you in the acknowledgments, too. This project will only work if we can get the word spread far and wide… from brides to foodies to mommies to the evening news, any help we can get would be tremendous!

♥  We need talent. Want to donate your blog design talent, graphic design skills, PR prowess, or layout mojo? We could use all the help we can get. Have a skill to offer that we haven’t mentioned? Let us know – we’d love to have your support, and we’ll do everything we can to give you the exposure and credit you deserve.

♥ We need recipes. If you a blogger who would like to share your most treasured comfort food recipe, we’d love to have you involved. Contact us and we’ll send you more information. We aim to cover all kinds of comfort foods, from breakfast to dessert, from the utterly decadent to the calorie-conscious, from gluten-free to vegan to meat-topped-with-cheese… bring it all on!

The Details
♥  You can donate any amount you choose, no minimum, no rules. Because every quarter is a quarter more than we had yesterday. It all adds up.
♥  We will donate 10% of all proceeds up to our goal, to the American Autoimmune Related Disease Association, so every dollar contributed not only goes toward my medical care, but also toward researching a cure to benefit everyone with autoimmune disease.
♥  Anything raised in excess of the goal will be split 50/50 with the AARDA – our portion of which will be saved in a dedicated, interest-bearing account toward any future surgeries and ongoing medical care.

Gulp. It seems like a lot to ask. But the internet is a big place. We see tens of thousands of readers come through here each week. If every blog visitor only parted with just $1 – we’d meet and surpass our goal within the first month alone.

Let’s see how far we can take this, so that millions of others with autoimmune disease can also benefit from this endeavor!

I sit here trembling as I type. Asking for and receiving help is not something I am used to doing. It is not in my nature. But, I am at a turning point, and am taking a leap of faith. After all… I’m the one who always says it never hurts to ask, right? So here I am… asking. I’m the one always sqwaking about taking leaps of faith and Making Things Happen, aren’t I?  I have to live my mission to my fullest extent, and that includes this.

My disease formed me into the creative, ambitious and irrepressible woman I am today, and it inspired the birth of this very site. While no one can yet cure my disease, the idea that this site and its community could rally up to ease my condition’s painful and limiting financial side effects gives me hope beyond expression.

What do you think? Will you help?

Gulp.

Thank you so much for reading!

Adios Twenty-then! Hello, Two-Thousand & Heaven!

We had an incredible year in 2010…. we’re so proud of all we accomplished! Pardon us for tooting our own horn, but its important for everyone to celebrate their accomplishments! Here are some highlights of our past year here at Broke-Ass HQ….

♥ We launched our exclusive Broke-Ass Cake Collection in partnership with celebrity cake designers Fantasy Frostings, and had a huge Cake Bash to kick it off. (In LA? Need a cake? Hit us up!) Look out for coverage of the Cake Bash in the Spring issue of The Bride & Bloom Magazine’s new SoCal edition!

♥ We won the Best Budget Blog Award in Wedding Channel’s Bridal Blog Awards, were named one of Weddzilla’s top 25 wedding blogs in their 2010 Guru Awards, and were included in BrideTide’s Top 100 Wedding Blogs list.

♥ Our site and writing were featured in eight bridal magazines, including our feature as Brides Magazine’s first-ever Blog Star in their December issue.

♥ We launched the Broke-Ass Bargain Bash, bringing our favorite products to brides everywhere, at 40-90% off regular prices.

♥ We brought on seven amazing contributing writers to provide a diversity of voices and interests, from industry insiders to real brides and everything in between.

♥ We launched our weekly Broke-Ass Brigade Newsletter, landing great inspiration, deals, freebies and giveaways directly in our readers inboxes.

♥ We incorporated our business, developed a mission, and became full-time legitimate bloggers. We attended several inspiring and educational workshops and conferences, partied at some amazing industry events, and got up close and personal with many of our industry heroes.

♥ We taught our first Blogging, Branding & Balance workshop, and spoke about green weddings at Backstage Bridal.

♥ Our traffic keeps growing and growing, we reached over 10,500 twitter followers and over 3,000 facebook fans. Our readers are some of the most loyal and bad-ass brides (and beyond) out there. We are so, so grateful to each and every one of you who come by and share in our community day after day. Without you, we’d be nothing!

We have tons of exciting goals in store for 2011… its going to be a RAD year!

What achievements are you celebrating from 2010? What are you most looking forward to in 2011?

We’re Brides Magazine’s First-Ever Blog Star!

I am dead as I type this. I died of excitement and joyful disbelief on November 8th, the day I got the December issue of Brides Magazine, at my local market. Croaked right there and then, in the parking lot. I remember rising above my body, a vaporous mist of a spirit, and looking down upon the horrified shoppers gathering around my cadaverous corpse…. wishing I could somehow let them know to turn to page 158 of the magazine clutched in my cold, dead hand, so they could see what did me in. I wished and wished and wished and wished to wake up! And then, by the sheer force of my zombie-like will to live, I rose up from the slab and heaved my body, still stiff with rigor mortis, to a standing position… and walked my undead self and my magazine, all the way home while everyone looked on, in awe.

Ok, so that’s not true. But that, my friends, is JUST HOW FREAKING BLOWN MY MIND IS that Brides Magazine asked us to write their first ever Blog Star column, and share some of our sneakiest budget tips in the December issue.  What the? Who the?  How the?  ….Oh hell to the yes!

We are humbled and honored, and would like to extend our deepest thanks to editor Millie Martini Bratton and her incredible staff. Having our blog and my writing featured in Brides is a real dream come true moment for me, and I’m still pinching myself over it!If you pick up the issue, turn to page 158 and check’a me out in living color! Do y’all like those tips?

{Meatless Mondays} Starts Today! (& its freaking delicious!)

I love to cook, a lot. A lot a lot. Like, A LAWT. Back when we were fancy, cable-having people, I watched the Food Network like it was porn and worshipped at the altar of Ina Garten. I cooked all the time.

Then we moved to a place that didn’t really have the best kitchen for cooking, and we cut the cable cord, so I slowed my cooking roll… but never stopped feeling that itch. That wanna-cook-twinge. It was always there.

So now that we’re finally in a new house with much dreamier kitchen (and Ina on hulu), I’ve been getting back in the game…. learning to better support my vegan diet requirements without leaning too much on processed foods, and LOVIN the results! Cooking at home keeps our bodies healthier and wallets heavier, (and who doesn’t want that?), so we thought it would be fun to share our favorite recipes with you in a new feature we’ll call Meatless Mondays!

You could be eating this! (yeah yeah, we’re working on our camera skillz)

While I could go on about the various health, environmental, ethical and fiscal benefits to moving to a plant-based diet, I don’t expect y’all to just give up meat and dairy just like that. It ain’t easy, I know… and its not necessarily for everyone. But I will encourage you to experiment! It doesn’t have to be “all or nothing” – try subbing out a meal or two each week with something meatless… I bet you won’t be sorry! The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone is a great starter resource that speaks to all levels of interest and commitment without judgment, but this short and sweet video from the Ted conference presents a great perspective on how every effort we each make, even if in baby steps, adds up to big results.

To celebrate kicking off Meatless Mondays, we’re amped to introduce this week’s Bargain Bash sale! Whether you’re trying to cut back on meat, or time in the kitchen, or those pesky extra holiday pounds…. Gobble Green‘s vegan and gluten-free meal delivery service is a bad-ass treat you’ll love to eat! You may remember Gobble Green from our Flab to Fab Test Lab, and we loved our month on the plan so much that we invited them to be part of the Bargain Bash!

This week (and this week only) you can score an introductory week of fresh, balanced, and delicious breakfasts, lunches and dinners served right to your door, anywhere in the US, at 44% off! With tasty items like banana nut muffins, “chicken” salad, and “meatloaf” with mashed potatoes… you’ll love the healthy, yummy convenience that Gobble Green delivers. Click here to get started!

Enough with the talk now…. ONTO THE FOOOOOD! Come on by later, we’ll be showing you our Pumpkin Harvest Alfredo Pasta. Now, doesn’t that sound sexy? Watch for falling drool!