Posts in the 'Broke-Ass Brilliance' Category

Can’t Afford It? Get Over It! Maggie Sottero’s Demi for Under $1200

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Whew! Does time ever fly in the hot summer sun, BABs! I hope you’re enjoying whatever weather you have in your corner of the world (and not suffering sunburn like I am as I write this post — oops!). Today’s inspiration comes from a New Jersey bride. I’ll let BAB reader and bride Karen tell you in her own words:  

“I’m in love with Maggie Sottero’s dress Demi in the ivory over light gold. Problem is I can’t find it anywhere in a bridal shop in NJ. Not to mention the fact that it’s $$$ and I’m probably going to only be able to spend $ on my dress. But what other dresses could emulate such a magnificent dress?!? Can’t get it out of my mind :( please help!!!! I don’t want to spend more than $1200. And what I love about this particular dress is not only the idea that it has straps and a low back but also and obviously the beading detail and the fact that it’s not pure white. It has an ivory layer over a light gold sheath. I love the antique look it has. And I love the slim line of the dress. Its not too much gown but it is breathtaking.”

I can see why you’d love that gown, Karen. It looks as comfortable as it is stunning! So let’s get to work!

Can't Afford It

Maggie Sottero Demi

Maggie Sottero Demi, $1,398

Get Over It

Mori Lee V-Neckline Gown with Beaded Illusion Straps

Mori Lee V-Neckline Gown with Beaded Illusion Straps, $1,180 at Best Bridal Prices

David's Bridal Tank Tulle V-Neck Gown with Metallic Beaded Detail

Tank Tulle V-Neck Gown with Metallic Beaded Detail, $700 at David’s Bridal

 

Adrianna Papell Gold Beaded Mesh Mermaid Gown

Adrianna Papell Gold Beaded Mesh Mermaid Gown, $170 at 6pm

David's Bridal Chiffon A Line with Beaded Bodice

Chiffon A-Line Gown with Beaded Bodice, $99 at David’s Bridal

Sue Wong Beaded & Floral Embroidered Gown

Sue Wong Beaded & Floral Embroidered Tulle Gown, $510, Saks Fifth Avenue

BHLDN Emeline Dress

Emeline Dress, $495 at BHLDN

Badgley Mischka Champagne Floral Embroidered Tulle Gown

Badgley Mischka Champagne Floral Embroidered Tulle Gown, $990 at Neiman Marcus

BHLDN Brooklyn Dress

Adrianna Papell Brooklyn Dress, $280 at BHLDN

Maggie Sottero Magnolia

Maggie Sottero Magnolia Gown, $1,198 at Best Bridal Prices

David's Bridal A-line Gown with Illusion Straps and Beaded Lace

A-line Gown with Illusion Straps and Beaded Lace, $99 at David’s Bridal

Moonlight Tango A-Line Metallic Embroidered Gown

Moonlight Tango A-Line Metallic Embroidered Gown, $548 at Best Bridal Prices

Kennedy Blue Sadie

Sadie Gown, $190 at Kennedy Blue

(with the leftover $ you can have a seamstress add metallic embellishments!)

Lisa’s Bonus Pro Tip: When gown hunting for specific features (like an embellishment or silhouette), try a web search using the terms that come to mind, then look to see how similar gowns in the search results are described to get ideas for additional search terms. 

Karen, are these gowns as magnifique as the Demi? I hope I’ve helped you to get over it! Drop me a line below to let me know how your search is going.

Got a gown that you just can’t get off your mind? We’re happy to help you get over it! Just tell us in the comments below! Please remember to include the budget you’re working with so we can find you the best alternative for you.

*As always, please do your own research before buying a gown online. Team Broke-Ass is here to provide you with inspiration and resources, but it is up to the consumer to know what they’re purchasing.

Real Bride Shannon: Addressing the OTHER Dress(es)

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Many a friendship has suffered some scrapes and bruises over bridesmaids dresses. Much like diamonds, dresses come with a handful of “C’s” to consider, too: color, cut, cost … you get it. I never felt too picky about what my ladies were wearing; I just wanted them to look good and feel good, and knowing the cash wasn’t exactly flowing for anyone, I wanted to cover the cost.

I’ve only stood beside one bride on her big day, and that was my sister. I did so in a custom-made boatneck frock with a mid-length flared skirt that cost me exactly $0 because my mom is a badass seamstress.

Real Bride Shannon custom bridesmaid dress

Thinking that was an excellent option because it A.) guaranteed a custom fit, B.) gave my mom a project, and C.) was a totally economical means of dressing my bridal party, my mom and I hit the pattern books and fabric bolts looking for something customizable since my three ‘maids represent three really different body types.

Uh, Dallas/Fort Worth, we have a problem.

We scoured every fabric store from the west side of Fort Worth to the Design District of Dallas and were coming up short on patterns that would fit the bill. And quality fabric? At as much as $45 a yard, this was looking less and less like something that would save money and more like a really expensive DIY that was going to cost my mother hours and hours of labor.

Abort mission.

My future husband and I had to put our heads together and look at the budget vs. what bridesmaids dresses actually cost. Since the general consensus was that we needed long dresses that were relatively formal, those dollar signs started racking up. At first, I tried the whole, “Just send me pictures of stuff you like!” avenue. This doesn’t work well. Your bridal party gives a shit about what you want, so giving them minimal guidelines can leave them feeling pretty overwhelmed. All those concerns you have about other people’s opinions totally come into play for someone charged with choosing something for your day. After pouting for a while because I didn’t think I was getting any help, I realized I needed to narrow the field. We determined we could spend $500 total on three dresses and I wanted them to be the same length and made with a flowy chiffon rather than structured satin. Ok. Now we’re getting somewhere.

I found the site For Her and For Him. The dresses were reasonably priced and there was a sale (there are frequently sales) that included a bulk discount and $10 custom sizing. Their color selection was killer and there wouldn’t be any problem coming in under budget. There is also a feature where you can send email invites to view a style board so I pulled a few designs that I liked and thought would fit my girls’ individual needs and we were off to the races.

Then there was the color conundrum. The primary colors in my palette are sangria and navy. While my sister agreed that navy dresses would make the purplish flowers pop, my bestie looks really, really good in that reddish-purple. My future sister in law just smiled and said she’d literally wear whatever I told her to wear. When the dresses had been chosen, I decided to go with three different colors because I can (dark plum purple with the sangria and navy). Everyone has a color that complements their skin tone. Everyone has a cut that flatters their respective figures. Woody and I came in $60 under budget. Win-win-win.

Real bride shannon multicolored chiffon bridesmaids dresses from For Her and For Him

Even though $440 plus about $600 for the groomsmen’s suits (which was as easy as asking for their measurements and ordering what Woody picked out) was a sizeable portion of our overall budget, there were still some Broke-Ass lessons in there.

Namely: Ordering in bulk offers discounts whether you’re footing the bill or each party member pays for their own. Logistically it’s great for matching colors because dye lots can have slight variations. We also made it clear to our attendants that this was our gift to them. I had dreams of getting custom etched Tiffany glassware or something else needlessly luxurious to say thank you, but picking up the tab for the biggest expense outside of travel (my girls are all local) was our way of saying “We love you,” through the whole process. It also evens the playing field if your party members have different finances. Your single sister with the killer job may have no problem dropping a couple hundred bucks on a dress that she probably won’t wear again, but your best friend who just had a baby might have to play budget volleyball to find an extra Benjamin.

Bottom line: you and your partner can handle it however it works best for you and your party, but they just might be Broke-Asses, too!

Are you using any wedding party costs to serve as a gift? Do you have other tips to make the experience more affordable? Let us know in the comments below!

 

Real Bride Emma: Hand-Drawn Hero

‘Sup BABs!

I’m back once again with a bibbity, boobbity blog, and this time I am super excited to be able to give a massive shout out to Miss Harriet de Winton.

I am very lucky to have this lady in my life, and even more lucky to have so much help from her with wedding stuff. She’s been super supportive from day one, and has said “yes, absolutely” to everything I’ve asked of her.

And more! She has recently gone one step further and has HAND DRAWN our invitations.

OMIGOD you guys, I cannot tell you how gorgeous these invitations are. I won’t pop them on here, as I want our guests to see them for the first time in real-life. BUT, she does has a website chock full of other designs she has done.

I’m just gonna leave these here:
Harriet Rococo

harrietmountain

harrietmore
Credit: Dewinton Paper Co.

I’m so pleased that our invitations will be unique to us. It feels so incredibly decadent to have something so fancy and bespoke. They set the tone for all the individual little touches we want on our day, and hopefully will get people really excited about our wedding.

As a BAB, however, I will say that the concession we are making to budget (and the environment) is that only day guests will get the printed version. Evening guests (bar a few who may not be tech savvy enough to have email) will get a lovely virtual version. Same design, same tender care, just less tree-death.

And if you’re looking for a stationer for your wedding, I can’t recommend Harriet highly enough. She is super efficient, incredibly talented, and I know she’d take the same care over your invitations as she did for one of her oldest friends. She’s just like that.

Am Dram Bride – out.

Real Bride Elissa: Filling in the Gaps

The last week has been the first test of our vows — our ability to look beyond our own sphere of stress and lighten the burden for the other. The wedding took up so much of our life for over a year, and after our honeymoon, we had to figure out what to do with our spare time and how to fill in the newly empty gaps. Exactly a month after the wedding, we found ourselves adopting a second dog. A dog that wasn’t trained; she has taken up every single minute of time and ounce of patience we both have. She’s already a fantastic little girl (and is fast asleep at my feet as I write), but the first few days were pretty touch-and-go. The dog we adopted together before the wedding was a little older, and already pretty much trained, so he took significantly less work. It’s been so interesting to take a step back and observe our differing parenting styles, and learn from the other person’s strengths and mistakes. It’s also been really nice to have those vows to reflect on, when things get a little insane.

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So what does this really have to do with weddings, you ask? Well, my advice is to make some solid plans for yourself, once it’s all over. The post-wedding blues were REAL. It took me at least two weeks to feel back to my normal self, but I still haven’t fully relaxed into every day life. If you take a honeymoon right after (or even if you don’t), try to take an extra day or two to just be at home together before you have to go back to work. I think that would have helped center us before we had to dive back into real life. But after that, you gotta get right back on that horse.

My biggest regret so far is thinking that I could take some time off from my exercise routine. I was so excited to not have to worry about my dress that I gained back the few pounds I lost right away, and I lost my progress in my endurance and strength-training. My parents also asked me last weekend what my hobbies are now that I’m done with the wedding, and I honestly didn’t have an answer for them. Granted, between working full-time and grad school part-time, friends, pets and blogging, there’s not much actual free time left over, but I wish I’d not let wedding planning become my hobby. I definitely feel a little adrift, on top of not feeling physically on top of my game anymore.

Instead of rediscovering the little things that made me happy and whole, I dove right back in to a big project — the dog. While I’m so thrilled about her, and her training progress in the last week, I just wish I’d thought a little more about my post-wedding plans, and actually scheduled some things to look forward to upon our return to everyday life. Maybe then I wouldn’t have felt as big of a gap? I haven’t even seen but one of my bridesmaids since we got back from our honeymoon! So a few weeks before your wedding, take some time out and think about what you love to do. Buy tickets for a show, plan a girls’ weekend, schedule guitar lessons or dance classes — something to get you back to feeling like YOU, instead of just BRIDE. You’re Bride You for a very short period of time, compared to the rest of your life. And if you do decide to get that pet, adopt, don’t shop!

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Our first family portrait, courtesy of the continuous self-timer on our camera.

For those married BABs out there, did you find yourselves in a similar spot? How did you cope? Tell us in the comments below!

Real Bride Katie: Making the Most of Our Registry

Real Bride Katie: Making the Most of Our Wedding Registry

With our wedding day fast approaching, we’ve started to pay more serious attention to our registries. As a second time bride, I can’t emphasize the following enough:

REGISTER FOR THE WAY YOU LIVE.

From bridal websites and magazines to the consultants in the stores who take advantage of your excitement over holding a scanner gun,  there is a lot of pressure to register for a particular type of item. But after the dust settles and all the wrapping paper has been pitched, you’re the one who has to store all of those items in your home.

Now, if you really are someone who has fancy formal dinner parties on the reg, more power to you. But if you’re not, don’t feel like you have to register for formal china and Waterford crystal. Instead, consider registering for high quality everyday items, like a bigger and/or nicer set of dishes, enough wine glasses for your whole crew, or a set of silverware that is nice to hold but also doesn’t need polishing.

Most of your guests will be happier knowing they’ve gifted you something you’ll actually lose. And if Grandma really wants to buy you something traditional, she’ll find a way no matter what you register for. But isn’t storing one ridiculous crystal bowl easier than storing the whole set?

Five for Friday: Accessories That Are Simply Fab

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Happy Friday, Broke-Asses! It’s been a crazy week around here, what with the awesomeness of the David’s Bridal sale, summer being her all-too-tempting-to-play-hooky self, the return of Ask Liz and so much more. When things get a little insane, I tend to fall down the rabbit hole of the Internet, and all too often find myself daydreaming about pretty dresses, fun home stuff and accessories … always accessories. Fab.com, one of my go-to resources for amazing design-centric decor, has a wedding shop. And nestled within that wedding shop is a great selection of jewelry and accessories, amazing for you or your crew. Here are five of my favorite finds, all under $100: Dual Stone Ring Onyx || Five for Friday: Accessories that are Simply Fab

Dual Stone Ring Onyx, $62

I’m a junkie for black diamonds and onyx. And opal is my birth stone. And I love rings (ALL THE RINGS). This pretty takes my breath away. Lapis Triangle Threaded Earring || Five for Friday: Accessories that are Simply Fab

Lapis Triangle Threader Earrings, $30

Something blue, anyone? These earrings would be great with a boho-y dress or a super-structured but offbeat gown. They give a little bit of a rock (pun intended) edge to your look. Herkimer Diamond Bracelet || Five for Friday: Accessories that are Simply Fab

Herkimer Diamond Bracelet, $45

Ugh, Herkimer diamonds. These rough-cut diamonds are specific to an are of New York, hence the name. I’ve been ogling a ring on Etsy forever with a Herkimer diamond, but I think this pretty bracelet would do juuuuust fine for a wedding day and all the days beyond. Mountain Range Ring|| Five for Friday: Accessories that are Simply Fab

Mountain Range Ring, $59

Initially, I thought this ring was more of a band that maintained its height all the way around. I was wrong, but it doesn’t make the ring any less badass.  Button Pouch || Five for Friday: Accessories that are Simply Fab

Button Pouch, $95

We’re big fans of marbling around here, and this pouch is no exception. It’s also available in a pretty blue, but I’m totally digging the pink and lime combination on this one.

Which of these gorgeous accessories catches your eye? Any fun weekend plans? Tell me in the comments below!

Ask Liz: No Gifts and No Ideas on Guest Seating

Yes, “Ask Liz” is back for the rest of the summer. If you have a burning wedding question, send it to info@brokeassbride.com. The team knows where to find me.

Centerpiece-and-favors-e1415062284872

Photo: Lucky Photographer

Dear Liz:

We had a small ceremony a few weeks ago, and we’re sending out our wedding announcements now. We don’t want anyone to send us gifts, how do we word that on the announcement?

Signed, 

No Swag, Please

Dear Swag,

Okay, so wedding announcements are a little different from wedding invitations. Traditionally, you’re not supposed to mention gifts on your invites at all — it’s rude to tell your guests that you expect them to get you something. This is why you put your gift registration on a separate card, or on another page of your wedding website. Never shove the gimme-grabbing in people’s faces. If you don’t want gifts, you can write something cute like, “No gifts, your presence is present enough” on a card or website, which, to be honest, causes my teeth to ache a little bit. I’m a bigger fan of not putting registration info in either, at all.  If someone asks where you’re registered, you tell them that you don’t want gifts, just guests (wince). Odds are, a few people won’t read or notice the omission, and will end up giving you cards with cash or checks in them. And the only response to that is “Thank you.”

But, since you’re sending wedding announcements, instead? Don’t mention gifts at all, unless someone asks, in which case you tell them, “No, we don’t want/need gifts, but thank you!” Always end with a thank you.

Dear Liz, 

Our wedding is in two weeks and we’re really struggling with how to seat people. The tables fit 10 people and we have 125 guests. Are there any “rules” for who should sit where? 

Signed, 

Table Tied

Dear Tied,

Ooh, most of the time I stay away from seating arrangements, because you know your guests,  and their various relationships with each other, and I … don’t. No one has an easy time doing it, though, if it’s any consolation. Start with who absolutely cannot be at the same table with each other — divorced couples, divorced parents, known mortal enemies, etc. Let’s call them the problem children. Put them at separate tables. Move on to your family and wedding party. Do you want your wedding party all at one table ,or is it okay if they are scattered around? Remember, couples and other family units should sit together. So, by now you have five or six tables of people who should and can spend an evening together, so just fill it in. Go over it at least three times (sorry), if you’re not sure, ask whoever whatever questions you need to in order to make it work , try not to overcompensate for the problem children. You can’t make everyone happy.  Once you’ve got the table seating down, work on where each table should go in relation to all the others. It’s not uncomplicated, but it’s definitely doable.

How’s your guest seating going? Are there more problem children than you thought? Let me know if you any questions or tips of your own in the comments below.

And if you would  like to find out more about me and my part of Wedding World, come over to www.silvercharmevents.com.

See you at the end of the aisle,

Liz

Can’t Afford It? Get Over It! A Julie Vino Bustier Top Gown for Under $3000

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Happy Thursday, folks! It is hot, hot, hot and humid in my neck of the woods these days, but you know what else is hot? Today’s CAI/GOI gown request from bride Catie. She commented on this post with the following:

“I have been in love with Julie Vino for quite some time! Nothing compares to this dress but I couldn’t fathom spending 10,000 dollars. I love a line gowns because of the flow and ease. The detail of these dresses are impeccable but yet so simple! Help me!!! Would like to find something like this for less than 3,000!”

The dress she is talking about is Style 603b from the 2014 Fall line. It is gorgeous! The gown features a flowing A-line skirt with train and a lace bustier corset top with spaghetti straps. Julie Vino is so good at designing gowns that are sexy, but not over the top. The 603b gown, in particular, is beautifully balanced with its long flowing skirt and detailed and somewhat revealing bustier. Julie Vino knows what she is doing, but with that knowledge comes a decidedly un-Broke-Ass price tag. Not to worry, Catie, I’m on it, with dress alternatives below that are actually even lower than your $3000 max budget. Let’s do this!

Can't Afford It julie vino style 603b a line corset top Julie Vino 603B Wedding Dress Fall 2014, ~$10,000

Get Over It BHLDN Penelope gown Penelope Gown from Love Marley by Watters (Style: 33158643), $970 at BHLDN

Maggie Sottero Joy 2015 Maggie Sottero Joy Wedding Dress (Style: 5MT012), $1,189 at BestBridalPrices

Impression Wedding Dress 10323 aline with beaded bodice Impression Wedding Dress, Spring 2015 (Style: 10323), $1,270 at BestBridalPrices

Dessy After Six Wedding Dress 1049 After Six Wedding Dress (Style: 1049), $525 at The Dessy Group

Alfred Angelo Wedding Dresses - Style 2515 Alfred Angelo Wedding Dress, Spring 2015 (Style: 2515), $749 at BestBridalPrices

BHLDN Gemma gown Gemma Gown (Style: 31061666), $1,000 at BHLDN

Mori Lee Voyage Style 6741 Mori Lee Voyage Wedding Dress, Spring 2013 (Style: 6741), $575 at BestBridalPrices

Nicole Miller Sloane Bridal gown Sloane Bridal Gown by Nicole Miller (Style: GQ10000), $1,500

Sophia Tolli Brandyn Sophia Tolli Brandyn Wedding Dress (Style: Y21518), $1,641 at BestBridalPrices

Lace Corset gown by beaubouquet on etsy Stunning Lace Corset Wedding Dress by beaubouquet (Style: BBWD11_sale), $899 with sale (regularly $1,200) via Etsy

Watters style 18410 corset top all over lace WTOO by Watters Bristol Wedding Dress (Style: 18410), $1,404 at BestBridalPrices

Kennedy Blue Avery Avery Bridal Gown, $799 at Kennedy Blue

Strapless Ball Gown with Lace Corset Bodice wg3633 david's bridal Strapless Ball Gown with Lace Corset Bodice (Style: WG3633), $599.99 at David’s Bridal

Mori Lee Voyage Style 6750 Mori Lee Voyage Wedding Dress, Spring 2013 (Style: 6750), $525 at BestBridalPrices

You could also try pairing separate skirt and top pieces. I’ve suggested an ivory skirt and two tops below from BHLDN that would pair nicely. Just be sure your top and skirt are the same or coordinating shades of white or ivory.

Della Maxi skirt BHLDN Delia Maxi Skirt by Catherine Deane (Style: 36297257), $800 at BHLDN

Maelin Corset BHLDN Maelin Corset from WTOO by Watters (Style: 34511634), $970 at BHLDN

Darla Camisole BHLDN Darla Camisole by Catherine Deane (Style: 36297000), $230 at BHLDN

Lastly, you could also purchase a corset top from the lingerie/shapewear section of your favorite store. Obviously, you’d be looking for something with a little more coverage than normal for this to work. (We don’t want Grandma passing out from witnessing a nip slip. ) But there is shapewear out there that could totally be rocked as a wedding top, and many look very much like the top of your favorite Julie Vino gown above. A suggestion:

Nicky Chantilly lace corset LUISAVIAROMA Nicky Chantilly Lace Corset from LUISAVIAROMA (Style: 9I-0KT010), $235 

 

Well, Catie, what do you think? I’ve given you a lot of different options in a variety of price points. I hope there’s a dress or skirt/top combo out there that gets you the Julie Vino look for less. Good luck and happy shopping!

Got a gown that you just can’t get off your mind? We’re happy to help you get over it! Just tell us in the comments below! Please remember to include the budget you’re working with so we can find you the best alternative for you.

*As always, please do your own research before buying a gown online. Team Broke-Ass is here to provide you with inspiration and resources, but it is up to the consumer to know what they’re purchasing.

Real Bride Julie: Zen and the Art of Wedding Planning

Sometimes, I feel like pulling out my hair when it comes to wedding planning. There are days, or even just hours at a time where the whole thing feels insurmountable and like I can’t get it all done in the time I’ve allotted myself. Other times, I feel a complete zen. Whatever will be will be. We’re going to figure out solutions. The right vendor will present themselves when we’re ready to find them. It occurs to me that as long as we get married, nobody will care if everything is perfect or not anyway. I had a day recently that was split between the two and it made me think a lot about where all the pressure I was feeling was really coming from.

It started out with me emailing back and forth with my bridesmaids about their dresses. The dresses themselves have been picked out for a while now. The question became where to order them from. There were two shops in question: One did alterations in-house; The other was $10 less but everyone would have to find their own seamstress to take care of their dress. I didn’t want to be too pushy and end up with the label of “Bridezilla” but I also feared being too wishy-washy. If the decision wasn’t made soon, my ladies would be walking down the aisle in whatever old thing they had laying around. With every email sent and received I couldn’t help but feel like my every response was being judged. My head was telling me everyone thought I was an idiot, or maybe they just thought I was a jerk. I was sure texts were going back and forth about my incompetence. I was frustrated. I was just trying to do the best by everyone to make sure they were saving as much money as possible because let’s be real, I’m not the only Broke-Ass involved in this wedding!

Later that same day, my mom and I picked up my 9-year-old niece from day camp. When we got back to my house we started talking about the wedding. She sat on the couch searching through a bridal catalogue. “You don’t need these … You don’t need this … or this … or this,” she said pointing at various decor items that she thought were superfluous. If she said it about something I did plan on including, I explained why and she accepted my explanation and moved on to the next item. She asked questions, and I didn’t feel nervous about answering. My oldest nephew (who is older than me by a few years … woohoo big families!) got married a few months back, and so she told me all the things she really liked about his wedding. They weren’t extravagant things. They were things like getting to sit with the people she liked, pretty color schemes and the fact that there was a box where people could share “ideas” (advice) with the bride and groom. It was super relaxing to be able to talk about the wedding with someone who was excited about the little things, but also really honest about how she felt about everything.  If I were to call myself a Bridezilla, chances are she’d find herself picturing a dinosaur in an ivory gown.  Whiteboardwedding

The “design” my niece came up with during our conversation. Short and sweet just like her!

This isn’t really about who I’m talking to though. My ‘maids and my flower girls all care about my wedding somewhat equally. Sometimes, the stories we create in our heads are much harsher than what is actually going on. I can cook up all sorts of crazy things for myself at times: Everybody thinks you’re high maintenance, or everybody thinks you’re a pushover. Everyone is trying to hijack your day. Nobody cares about your wedding and finds the whole thing to be a total annoyance. The people you’re thinking these thoughts about most likely love you very much. That’s why they’re part of your day. In turn, you likely love them very much as well and that’s why their opinion of you means so much. If they’re questioning you, maybe it’s because they have more experience. Maybe it’s because they have less experience and think you’ll have better answers than they will. Maybe they’re even just looking to see what’s up. Talking with adults comes with certain expectations, some founded and others unfounded. Maybe that’s what sets them apart from talking to kids.

The secret of wedding zen might not be dealing solely with children as I plan out my special day. It could be more about leaving my assumptions and concerns about what people are thinking about me at the front door. I’d probably be better off taking people at face value instead of letting my insecurities come alive and run wild through my mind. I need to push issues that mean something to me and not sweat the issues that don’t. These insecurities don’t serve me any purpose except to separate me from those I love and create unnecessary stress surrounding a day that’s supposed to be about coming together and being happy. Even if people really are thinking any of those things, does it serve me, my sanity or my wedding to acknowledge it? In most situations, not really.
At the end of the day, we picked a bridal boutique and got the ball rolling on ordering dresses. One day, I was freaking out that we wouldn’t be able to get our act together, and literally the next we were all set. My freaking out was for naught. It all came together in the end anyway, with the help of the people I love enough to ask to stand next to me at the altar, and a few new ideas from one of the kids that will be tossing flowers all over the place.

How have you managed your wedding freak outs? Have you received any sage wisdom from an unexpected source? Share in the comments!