Can’t afford it? Get over it.
I’m guilty of it too, my dears. I was a “Vera Wang or bust” bride in the beginning… thinking I could somehow magically afford a gown that was over half our wedding budget. And I’ll be frank, our wedding ended up costing $12,500. So imagine if I had spent half that budget on the dress… we would have had to pull a wacky-but-not-in-a-good-way stunt like, get married in our apartment and have our reception sans booze at a Chuck E. Cheese… All so I could wear this Vera Wang gown, a.k.a., my first wedding gown obsession:
The very first dress I ever wanted… that was waaaaaaay waaaaaay WAY out of our budget. But somehow those three “waaaays” didn’t mean a damn thing to me in the beginning. I wanted this dress and I was going to do anything to get it.
I scoured PreOwned Wedding Dresses, OnceWed, and Bride Power every hour on the hour in hopes that some bride out there was selling this gown. And of course no one was. And as a result, I spent way too much time obsessing over it. I was being ridiculous! There was absolutely no chance in hell I would have been able to afford this dress. This is what I learned: Once you see the love of your life gown, put the cost of it in perspective. Let yourself love it for a couple days – MAX. Then let it go. Easier said that done, yes, but once I came to my senses and realized the Vera was way out of my reach, I started to search for similar gowns in my price range. And Ladies, I am telling you right now that Vera is not the only option in unique elegance. I found tons of gowns with just as much style for a fraction of what Vera, Monique, and Carolina are charging. Here are a few examples… starting with the expensive dress, followed up by the far cheaper version…
The “Can’t Afford It” Version:
This Dress is made by Vineyard and retails for about $3,000.
The “Get Over It” Version”
This dress is similar to the Vineyard dress, but retails for about $800. That’s $2200 less!
The “Can’t Afford It” Version:
This Melissa Sweet gown retails for about $4,000
The “Get Over It” Version:
This Watters gown retails for about $1500
The “Can’t Afford It” Version:
This Monique Lhuillier gown retails for about $3,500
The “Get Over It” Version”
This Wtoo dress retails for about $800
The “Can’t Afford It” Version:
This Vera Wang gown retails for about $aBajillionDollars, errr, I mean, $9,000.
The “Get Over It” Version”
This Watters gown retails for about $1300
I clearly gravitated towards the brands Watters and Wtoo in my search for high quality, cheaper versions of expensive gowns… but there are a ton more brands out there that offer similar cheap deals on gorgeous gowns.
Are you obsessed with a gown you know you can’t afford? Have a you found a cheaper alternative to it yet? If so, tell us your story and help a fellow bride looking to replace her “can’t afford it” option with a “get over it” option.
Perspective is a good thing in wedding world. I rented my wedding dress, and with alterations it was about $800. Sometimes I regret not buying one, but I wouldn't even be able to fit into it now, so it all worked out.
Actually my to expensive/get over it issue is with photography right now. The person I loved and was affordable booked up 3 days after I called her. The next picks are WAY out of our budget. And I mean way out. So I'm trying to find someone that we love and can get over loser photographer A, without killing the bank and man oh man. Tears tears tears.
The gown I fell in love with had a price tag of $3500. I had it custom made by an AMAZING seamstress… for $850, including all alterations and any changes I wanted. It was seriously the best thing I did.
awesome post! i really love that you did a few different dress styles too! When i went shopping for my dress i told the salesperson not to even show me a dress more than $800 or I would have to beat him mercilessly. I found a gorgeous dress and you would never ever guess it was only $600 (on sale)! Great advice about letting things go you can't afford. Our budget is $10K so anything that's too expensive that I can't re-create easily and for cheap gets tossed rather quickly.
I totally fell in love with a $10k Carolina wedding dress…. and I mean, DIED for it. Seriously, I'm writing to you from beyond the grave. Alas, I had to come to my senses, and move along. I ended up being waaaaay, waaaaaaaaaay, WAAAAAAAAY happier with my sweet little poof of a dress! I still look at the photos of Carolina's dress.. just when I feel like torturing myself.
PS Chuck E Cheeze sells beer. Just Sayin'.
The cost of wedding dresses can be outrageous! I found some affordable wedding dresses for less than $200. Check them out on my blog eventsbytammy.blogspot.com.
Try craiglist. You may be able to find a photographer that has a special going on.
One of the first dresses I fell in LOVE with was a Nicole Miller dress (I'm not COMPLETELY over it yet, but working on it) was $1200…pretty realistic price still, but we're cutting corners wherever we can. I found an amazing dress (although it wasn't the same dress) at a second hand shop (Brides of France in Minneapolis). It's my size, it looks amazing on me, only alterations need to be made in the hip seams, and I saved $700. I'm still doing my happy dance over saving some money!
I fell in love with a dress that I can't even find the price for, which told me right away to forget about it. I have actually been looking at BRIDESMAIDS dresses in Ivory, which looks better on my anyway, and it looks like I am going to get exactly the dress I want for about $200. Score! Once I started thinking outside the box a whole world of possibilities opened up.
It is refreshing to know that you were searching for your photographer based on a style that you like even if your list of preferred photographers are out of your budget. But keep in mind that most photographers will work with you on price, products, and payment options. Especially if you tell them how much you love their work, and that you would do ANYTHING to have them as your photographer. It makes us feel good. LOL
I am currently in major love with a $3,000 Priscilla of Boston dress. I don't know what our total budget will be (aka my dad hasn't told me yet how much he's gifting us), so I may be falling out of love with it soon. Thanks for posting the alternatives. I'm off to go do a google search of my own!!
Oh I love this post–it makes me feel like I'm not alone in my obsession (I am in la-la-LOVE with Amsale, but obviously my budget isn't). I thought I would never get over it. Thanks for the encouragement! lol.
And, actually, I really like the "Get over it" version of the first dress!
Thanks!
That is great! I didn't even think of bridesmaid dresses! Some of those are prettier anyway!
For 2011 brides: Vera Wang has a new line coming out called "White" that will be sold at David's Bridal. The line is coming out in Feb 2011 and the dresses will retail from $600-$1400. If my wedding wasn't happening this year I certainly would be making my way to check those dresses out!
While the idea of this post makes me happy, the reality is that the "Get Over It" versions are my "Can't Afford It" dresses. I've been swooning for Watters and Wtoo for YEARS but it's just not going to happen for me. A 4k budget isn't allowing for a lacey dress. Le sigh.
Check out some of Jim Hjelm's bridesmaids dresses – AMAZING style!!
dream: http://www.clairepettibone.com/bridal/?cp=gowns/t… (ignore the name of the dress) haha. get-over-it version: http://www.jcrew.com/wedding/Wedding_Bride/gowns/… (which i actually like better)
Yeah. I totally totally get you, girl. I will see if I can come up with some "Get Over It" versions of the "Get Over it" gowns in this post… I wouldn't be surprised if I could find cheaper… say, in the 300-500 range? Keep a lookout for that post =)
Nicole,
Try a great seamstress. I went to a bridal salon, tried on a bunch of dresses and found the silhouette and style I wanted. It was 3k so I had to pass. Having seen myself in something close to what I wanted, though, I felt confident having a seamstress make my dress.
Fabric + custom-made dress are gonna cost me under $750. $350 for fabric, $350 for seamstress, +possibly a little extra if i want extra beading.
Just be sure you find someone that comes very well recommended and/or has lots of photos of previous work. Also, I'd recommend trying dresses out at a bridal salon so you can figure out what you really want.
Hey gals – here is a "get over it" version of the Vineyard dress above – for only $449. It's one of my favorites so far!
http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Strapless-Sha…
this is a great post…. and yes you are right every expensive dress does have a dress that looks almost like it for half the price or less…. I have even noticed that on the show say Yes to the dress…. girls come in with different price ranges and sometimes the dresses look the same with just a different price tag
Great find! That is GORGEOUS!
I actually bought the second expensive gown in this post, the Melissa Sweet $4000 one, at a Priscilla sample sale. For $200. That's two hundred. I am still floored. If you are size 10 or smaller, and have some time to wait for their next warehouse sale, definitely check it out. I didn't have a particular dress in mind when I went, but I fell absolutely in love with this one. It's a bit snug and needs cleaning/alterations, but I have a year until the wedding so I'm not concerned. Sample sales are hit or miss, but you never know! Sign up for emails from Priscilla to hear about them. Good luck in your search!
Nicole, the next best thing, then, is to check through etsy. Many amazing indie designers are available selling dresses for a fraction of what store-bought dresses can cost. Happy hunting!
You can find tons of good deals on Craigs List. I found ours for $450 for 5 hours including travel, a CD with all of the images, editing, and printing rights. A lot of them will have specials if you mention their Craigslist ad.
Martina liana
2011 wedding
wedding dress for sale
wedding dress for sale
I bought mine on Ebay. It's not a "traditional" wedding dress, actually it's a Bridesmaid dress, but so pretty and I love it and it was only $30…so excited.
I bought mine on Ebay. It's not a "traditional" wedding dress, actually it's a Bridesmaid dress, but so pretty and I love it and it was only $30…so excited.
My alternative to cheap wedding gowns… eBay! I thought they would only sell lame 80's couture but much to my surprise they have literally thousands of looks that I wonder if a bridal salon could really top. And the prices only sweeten the deal. I just saw my dream no name 'get over it' dress begging me to buy it for only $115. That sure beats the Pnina Tornai I saw on Say Yes to the Dress for $16 000. They look practically the same; no doubt in quality whatsoever. Broke-ass-bride, please keep up with the posts. I simply love your ideas. No bride should have spend an arm and a leg on their dress.