cheap wedding inspiration

The Invite Slash To Save Wedding Cash

Congratulations! You haven’t had the shiny, shiny diamond on your finger long enough to get a ring tan, so now it’s time to put first things first. If the bridal show is your first bridal rite of passage, your invite list is the first bridal gauntlet run. After the wedding date, it’s the primary question any venue is going to ask: How many guests are you having? Well, let’s see…

It is a truth universally recognized that the more guests you have, the more you’re going to have to spend on your wedding. 20 guests at, say, $50 per person (not including tax and service, of course) is $1,000. Once you figure out how many guests you have, you can reasonably figure out how much you’re going to have to spend.

Where to begin, where to begin? First of all, before you get your list together, try to avoid making any promises to anyone. Don’t tell them the date (though you should have this figured out before you start), don’t promise to send them an invite, don’t even go as far as to say that you’re trying to keep it small. If they ask, just tell them that you “haven’t even gotten that far.” Because you haven’t. Do not add “But I’ll let you know.” Managing expectations is the first step to managing your guest list. Make sure your fiance gets the memo on that one.

So, let’s say that your initial estimate is 100 guests, and that’s also how many guests you want at your wedding. That’s fine, but don’t just guess how many guests you’re going to have, write it down. I’m a big fan of doing things in batches, so you should each make a list of  the first 25 people who come to mind, which will probably include your families and close friends. Multi-task to make it less of a task. Schedule a time to do it together, over dinner or something. Then, while you’re still sitting down, add another 25 each, which will get you to 100. Make sure you’ve added everyone’s significant others. Don’t worry about addresses right now. Check each others lists for duplicates. Then send the list off to your parents or anyone else who could possibly have a say, and give them a week to get back to you.

You now have entirely too many people on your guest list.

But it’s not time to be ruthless, not just yet.

Who ARE all these people? (Photo courtesy of Sun Dance Photography)

Now that you have the “master” list, divide it into 3 categories:

1. The people you absolutely want and who need to be there, even if it’s political  (Boss and his wife, your Dad’s new step-children, you get the idea).

2. The people you know probably won’t be able to make it for whatever reason, but who will need an invite anyway.

3. The people one or both of you have never heard of, or have a passing acquaintance with. Include those who you know don’t care if they get an invite or not.

Make a note next to each name, as to who submitted it – you, him or your family.  Okay, now is the time to get ruthless.

How many folks do you have to cut? Let’s say it’s a semi-drastic amount, like 50 (= $2500). Breathe. Statistically speaking 10-15% of all of your invitees will decline, but you can never tell which ones! No, really, BREATHE.

First of all, eliminate the folks in #2, who you are 85-90% sure are not going to show. We’re talking about your cousin in Zimbabwe, your college roommate who’s due to have twins halfway around the country at that time, your mentor who’s going to be on the last Space Shuttle mission, you know who these people are. Make a note if you have to send them an invite anyway.

Okay, where are you now? Time to tackle  the names in #3. Schedule a time to start with your lists, first. Who are these people that one of you has never heard of or doesn’t know? Do they really need to be invited to your wedding, and be expected to attend? Can any of them be put into list #2? Which ones already know about it, which ones have expressed an interest in attending? You can eliminate more people right there.

It’s your parents’ names in this category that could be the hardest. You each need to deal with your own set. Come armed with specific names. Be nice about it, mention your budget, that you would really like to invite everyone, but you can’t, and ask them the same questions that you’ve asked each other. Thank them for understanding. If you don’t have that type of relationship with your parents, now is a good time to start.

Guest list still too big? Repeat the process. I never said this was going to be easy! If you’re still having problems, eliminate any co-workers, teammates, or other business associates. Once you realize that this is what you have to do, start floating around the idea that this will be a small wedding that’s going to be mostly family and family friends. Don’t use the term “close friends” because you’re affirming that they are not in that category, which is.. mean? Tacky? Just avoid it.

Where are you having problems cutting your list? And what tactics/rules are you using to get it done? Let me know and ask your questions  in the comments!

This week’s deals:

WeddingChannel.com and Us Weekly are launching their  3^rd Annual “Dream Wedding” program – a contest for celeb-loving engaged couples to win a $100,000 Hollywood-style wedding. Wedding planned entirely by WeddingChannel.com and their fabulous  A-list wedding experts? Check! Wedding profiled in Us Weekly magazine and Wedding Channel.com? Check!  You have until Thursday, July 29 to enter at www.usmagazine.com/wedding. On August 3rd, 10 couple finalists will be announced, and America votes for their favorite couple. The Dream Wedding winning couple will be announced online on August 13th, and the wedding planning begins!

Rima Campbell photography is giving away a free destination wedding photography package. Follow the link for details, and good luck!

Alajon Printing and Design is offering 100 letterpress invitations and enclosure cards, like the one right here, for only $439, which at less than $5 each is such a steal.

David’s Bridal, always upping their game, is selling Wedding Invitations, too. DIY kits start at $24.00, and pre-printed invitations start at $59.00 for 100.

Everything in The Knot.com Shop is 15% off. Yes, Everything.

Oh, and take a look at Candy Buffet 101 at Project Wedding. Find out how to put one together, and how to put it together under budget. Enjoy!

People! Have you signed up for the soon-to-be launched Broke-Ass Bride weekly newsletter! We’ve been hooking up some ahhhhmazing exclusive giveaways, deals, steals and more… you won’t want to miss out!

See you at the end of the aisle,